This years Halloween has brought new things into my life….How to carve a pumpkin without triangular eyes, nose and mouth!!!   What do you think of this creation of mine?

Is that a “Bears Butt”?????

Bears Butt

Oct. 2011

Well, I just found out that today is predicted to be the end of the world by some guy in California, who apparently is close to God and calculated this to be the end.  I guess we have until midnight for that to happen.?!

So, I have always wanted to let the world know my thoughts on how our planet has gone from a frozen wasteland to what it is today.  Here is what I believe:

However the earth was formed I do not know, but I believe it was a solid mass of very cold and ice covered dirt ball.  Over eons of time, what with it spinning round and round and circling the sun, it actually got closer to the sun at some point and that started the ice to melt.  Again, over eons and eons of continuing to go round and round and circle the sun, that melting ice formed the oceans and as the ice melted back it dragged with it rocks and dirt and formed deep gouges in the earths surface.  At the same time, water got under large land masses that were exposed from the melting ice.  And the earth continued to go round and round and circle the sun.  Plants began to grow where the earth was exposed and because the earth was tilted just so, those plants were growing in the warmest climate found on the planet.  Much like that of the Central part of South America, or the Hawaiian Islands.  All of the plants were like ferns and palm trees and such that grow in those places today.

The land was virtually covered in these plants.  Very dense forested areas and the climate was quite humid, with lots of rain fall and hot.

Soon life began to emerge, at first small animals and “things” only recognized today as fossils.  And over many more eons of time, the animals got larger and larger and larger.

I mentioned the water that got under the large land masses.  As time went on, the earths axis, which was tipped very much different than it is today, continued to change ever so slightly.  With this change in the axis, the angle of the sun in relation to the land masses caused changes in the environment of those large land masses.  Also, the turning round and round started these large land masses to begin to separate.  Water from the large oceans would fill in the gaps and actually assist in separating these large and floating land masses.  Some call it Continental Drift.  I truly believe in that theory.

Climates that once were very warm slowly eeked their way into cooler climates and the animals that happened to be on those large chunks of land either adapted to the change or died.  Again, and continuing today, the earth is tipping ever so slightly on it’s axis and climates are changing.

We hear about global warming, but we see changes in the seasons from one area to another.  Some of us remember when August was the hottest month of the year, but now it seems July is that month.  Old timers used to talk about the heavy snows that would come in January, but don’t we see most of our snow here in Utah happening in December?  What used to be seems to be two or three weeks off from what it was before.  Maybe it’s just me.

It’s a combination of all of these things that is causing the changes to the earth.  Continental drift continues to happen.  The axis is continuing to change slightly, which is effecting the angle of the sun hitting the earth.  I believe the Arctic circle and subsequent huge land mass attached to it are moving in what I call, up and over the top.  Some many millions of years from now, I can see where I stand today, will be where the North Pole is sticking up today.  Adapt or die.  Or move.

How do I explain the finding of hairy mammoths found enclosed in ice?  A drastic change in the earths tipping on its axis.  It does not take much of a change to cause major changes in the environment.  And perhaps the earth was struck by a huge meteor or smallish planet that caused the major change.  Whatever it was, it caught lots of critters, and people, off guard and they were captured in huge snow and ice storms and that is where they died.  Too abrupt a change for them to adapt.

Continental drift is a very good theory because discoveries have been found of common cultures and tools found in Africa and in South America.  The people of both continents lived similar lives and had similar beliefs, even though they lived thousands of miles apart and had an ocean between them.  It only makes sense.

And so, I say, enjoy your time here today, because change is happening every day around you.  I can feel a briskness in the air that seems to be a bit later than it happened last year.  Have you looked at the bright fall colors?  Now look at the calendar, it’s the end of the world, according to that one guy, Oct. 21, 2011.  Why are the leaves still on the trees in the mountains?  The deer hunt starts tomorrow!  The leaves are always off the trees when the deer hunt begins!  Have we slipped another part of a degree on our axis?  Is my theory wrong and I have a sense that instead of drifting north by north west and we are actually drifting south by south east?

Well, there you have it…my thoughts.

If the world ends later today, I hope to see you all wherever we end up.

Bears Butt

Oct. 21, 2011….is it the end of the world?

When I was working, well, let’s just say, before I retired, we would have a staff meeting every Tuesday morning around 10 a.m.  All the section and branch chiefs would give a short “what’s going on in their department” briefing to the Director and of course everyone in the room heard what was happening.  If there were issues between departments we would iron them out.  We would also get a boost speech from “the man” which was meant to help us through the next week.

Well, I made up a Bingo board with key words in the squares and passed them around to some of my supervisor cronies.  It was all meant to be in fun and we did have some fun, at the expense of the director of course.

Here is how it went.  I put words on the squares like “teamwork”, “sharing”, “together”, “helping”, “synergy”, “safety”, “timing” etc., you get the drift.  Words that reflect what was happening in the work environment at the time.

As the “mans” speech was said, if any of the words on the boards were said and if those words formed into a bingo, straight line, diagonal or horizontal across your board, you stood up and yelled “BULLSH#%”!

Bullsh#T Bingo was the name.

Try it in your office at your next staff meeting!  But don’t come to me if you get fired!

Bears Butt

Oct. 2011

With Winter coming on strong, we are all going to be spending a considerable amount of time in doors.  With that will come additional cooking and the potential for a kitchen fire.  This link was sent to me and I feel it is important enough to post it here on my blog site.  This could save your home, someones life or severe personal damage in a number of ways.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTpetEqxJP

Bears Butt

Oct. 2011

This humorous story was found in Aunt Maria’s trunk when we were going through all of the heirlooms in the attic.

—————————————

A LITTLE BOOKLET  “ WRITTEN TO GOD”

BY REELING MARADEN?

(Published Deurich Press, Chula Vista, California

Please god, I’ve said “now I lay me”, and if you have any time to spare I would like to ask you something Mother and Daddy are too busy to tell me.

I’m seven years old, and Mother says I’ve gotten into an awful habit of telling lies.  She says it is wicked God?  I sure would like to know, I’m all mixed up about that!

The other day I told a lie that got me into an awful mess; I just had to tell it though, for it was like this, God.

Every time I get in a fight Mother spanks me, and so when I socked Benny in the eye, because he kicked me in the stomach, I told Mother I didn’t do it.  See, God?  I didn’t want to get a licking!

But Daddy found out that I did, and he said to Mother, “We can’t let that boy go on like this!  He will have to be punished. “And so they did, for telling that lie.  And now Mother won’t let me go to the pony and dog show because I socked Benny, and it sure it tough luck, now isn’t it?

I don’t understand about this spanking business, God.  And this is what I wanted to ask you—“ Now I socked Benny in the eye, and Mother socked me right on my bare bottom and it hurt like the dickens!  Now God, who is going to sock Mother because she socked me!  Isn’t it just as bad for Mother to sock me as it is for me to sock Benny!

Of course Mother and Daddy are Good, but I do must like they do, and they say I am bad!

The other night Mother put me to bed at seven o’clock and said for me to go to sleep; that she and Daddy were going to sit in the other room and read.  I couldn’t go to sleep, so I called Mother to let me come in where she and Daddy were and play with my new engine,  But she didn’t answer, so I got up and went in nobody was there, and when I called to Nannie and asked where Mother and Daddy were she said “ They slipped out, because they didn’t want you to know they had gone and went to the bridge party.”

So you see, God, they tell lies too.  They do for a fact!  And nobody socks them, and they need it awful bad!

Mother says that if I say my prayers to you and ask you to make me good that you will do it.  Well I’ve asked you lots of times.  Now why don’t you God!  And please, God, Explain to me what is good, I sure don’t know.

Mother says that if I want anything to ask you.  So now, God , I wish you would sock Mother and Daddy.  They must have something done to them!

You just can’t let them go on like this!  And please tell me, God, if you were a little boy like me, and there was a pony and dog show in town, and your Mother wouldn’t let you go, what would you do?  Now I ask you God?

Well, I know what I’m going to do!  I’m going to run away and crawl under the tent!  Mother and Daddy run away from me and to the bridge parties, so why can’t I run away and to the pony and dog show!

Good night, God!  And please don’t forget to give Mother and Daddy a good spanking.

————————————

The Mother of this little boy was just entering the room when his prayer began.  When it was finished she closed the door softly and tip toed downstairs and related to her husband, what she had over heard.

They were very much amused and laughed hilariously!  With great gusto and pride they told of the cleverness of their son.  But they kept on doing what they had been doing and the son kept on doing what he had been doing.

———————————

What is the matter with this younger generation?

Feb. 9, 2003

Spent most of yesterday with the family making pumpkins for Halloween.  The kids painted up one and then carved a second one.  Of course the carved ones took some adults to help get the job done, but they turned out pretty neat!  Here are some pics of during the event!

And the end results are these:

The white pumpkin is Aprils and she says because she is a mommy, her pumpkin needed to look like a mummy!  Great job kids!  It was a very fun day!

As kids, the only way to do a pumpkin was to carve it and make triangle shapes for eyes, noses and mouths, but not anymore!

Bears Butt

Oct. 2011

Well, I have been working like a fool to get ready the next adventure of Sir Butt and I believe I am very close.  I shall run my draft past the publishing editor and of course he will want to change everything.  And after I have done all of that and he approves, he will pass it on to someone who knows nothing about prose and good taste and they will want it changed again.

And since I am being paid so very dearly for this, I will change it again, and it will look very much like what I delivered to the publishing editor in the first place and then…..AND THEN…..you shall be given the story, one day at a time, just like the last two stories.

In my mind, this is the best one yet and I sure hope you enjoy reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it.  For those of you who like to read between the lines you will be a bit disappointed.  But for the rest of you out for pure entertainment you should get a kick out of it.

Of course it is rated “G” for good, but you might want to read it yourself, in its entirety before allowing your children to read it, or for you to read it to them.

Violence?  YES…two dragons are sliced to smithereens.

Vulgarity?  I CAN”T REMEMBER, but I don’t think so.

Sexual Innuendos?  Only one mention of a Fair Maiden.

Drinking and Alcohol?  YES…LOTS AND LOTS!

Smoking?  Only from camp fires.

Brutality towards pets?  NO!

The story does tell you what the edges of Common Ground look like.  That should keep you coming back to read more and more.

So, when it begins I hope each of you come back daily and check it out.  I will probably leave you hanging in suspense occasionally, but it will be worth the wait.

No matter.  I just had fun writing it and if nobody reads it, that’s ok too.

Bears Butt

Oct. 2011

Sir Butt is up to quite an adventure lately.  Of course you don’t know it yet, but when he finally gets released I think you are going to enjoy the ride.

Bears Butt

Oct. 2011

Hey!  Don’t give up!  I have my next idea for a Sir Butt adventure cookin!  You might say it has a Christmas theme about it!  Stand by!  It will be a few days yet, but then, we still have a few days before Christmas, Right?

Bears Butt

Oct. 2011

At rendezvous this year my nephew Softball (Jay) gave me a picture he took of me and entered into the county fair.  Of course with his abilities with the camera he took a Blue Ribbon with the picture.  The picture is sorta nice and I am very glad to have it….Thanks Jay!

Upon receipt of the picture Twister said he would be happy to make a frame for it and he took the picture with him.  As for payment for him to make the frame he had already spent one night in the Bears Butt and Winemaker bed and breakfast mobile motel, but I insisted he spend one more night in the same and this time not skip out on the breakfast part of the deal….he agreed and it was done the next morning.

Last Saturday evening he brought the frame and presented it to me.  What a nice frame it is indeed!  He had recently cut down a branch off a “Willow” tree (Willow Creek Free Trappers comes to mind).  And he took that branch and split it lengthwise in half.  He nursed those two pieces for a couple of weeks by turning them over every two hours in the hot sun to dry.  An ordeal that took much discipline.  He did not want the bark to dry and come off of the underlying wood.

After the wood dried, he carefully employed his skills as a carpenter and sanded it flat on the backside and then again on the inside, which would become the inside of the frame once finished.  Then he cut the 45 degree angles making up the corners and fastened it all together.  Putting in a glass and viola!  Done.  This is the end result.

My photograph of the picture and frame does not do it the justice it deserves but over all you can see it is a very nicely done.  Both Softballs picture and Twisters frame.

Thank you both from the bottom of my heart!

Bears Butt

Sept. 2011