I probably should be holding off on this announcement until tomorrow, but I just can’t.  I love this one, because even if it wasn’t a National holiday, someone would be doing it anyway.  It happens everyday you know.

So, what is it?  Tomorrow, April 13, is not only Friday the 13th, but it is also, “National Blame Someone Else” day.

It wasn’t me.  Not me man.  I don’t know anything about it.  What are you looking at me for, look at him!  I don’t even have a key to that thing, why would you think it was me?  My job doesn’t even take me near that process.  I never forget to close the freezer door.  Soda spilled on the living room floor?  I never drink soda.  I always put the toilet seat down.  Oh, he must have forgot to put the check in the mail.  What do you mean paddle harder, YOU were the one who forgot to put the plug in the boat!  Don’t blame me for you not having enough gas to get to work.  I had the car back before midnight, you could have gotten out of bed and gone and got some.  It’s those guys at Westinghouse building these danged things.  I set the timer to turn the oven  off after 50 minutes.  The neighbor kids must have snuck into the yard and turned it on after I washed the car.  What?  I don’t even know her name!  You know if it was me I would have called you first thing this morning.

Yup!  Blame someone else today and don’t think a second thought about it.

Oh.  And some on the web say that this holiday really falls on the first Friday the 13th of the year.  THEY ARE WRONG!

Bears Butt

April 12 (almost 13th), 2012

It’s spring time in the rockies.  We are all busy with our gardens, lawns and outdoor things.  Old man winter had us all locked up in our cozy little houses and now with warm weather out we come like the ants crawling in my lawn.  What a nice time of year!

We like the sounds of wind chimes and so I want you to know how to make one that won’t cost you anything but some time.  Well, you might end up at a local thrift store or some such place to buy some of the things, but then too, you might want to empty out one of your kitchen drawers and use some of the stuff in there that you never use.

Start with a stick.  You decide on the length, girth etc.  It really doesn’t matter, but bigger is always better, right?  A really good start is to answer the question of where are you going to hang this thing when you are done.

Don’t throw that old fishing line away.  You know the stuff on your reel that you plan on taking off and replacing with some new line this year.  Remember, you lost a really nice fish last year and it was all because of that old line on the reel.  Tie lengths of fishing line around the stick at intervals only you can decide.  Some will be longer than others and that is ok, because that is how “real” wind chimes are made.

Now this is the fun part.  Anything made out of metal can be used to hang from the stick and fishing line.  Make sure the things you use can touch each other as the wind blows through them.  Forks and spoons from the kitchen drawer are wonderful little “tinklers”.  So are spend (fired, shot) rifle cartridges.  I’d stay away from knives, unless of course they are the butter knives.

Some folks will even use wood as their “hangerdowners”.  They too make a nice clunking noise in the wind.

Ok!  There you have it!  Make yourself a wind chime and impress the neighbors.  Remember, “BIGGER IS ALWAYS BETTER”!!!

Bears Butt

April 12, 2012

If you were a fish in any of the waters of Utah you probably have seen about every type of fishing bait and/or lure made.  And you probably have seen them more than once.  It’s no wonder you grub your nose into the muddy bottom seeking snails and other things that you know do not have a hook inside it.

You shy away from smelly jelly and powerbait and of course a worm is out of your diet plan as well.  But still you do get hungry and want something on the order of a smaller fish to go along with your escargot.  You mother probably did not have the time to tell you to mix up your eating habits by having one of this and then one of that as you gorge yourself.

Suddenly you are faced with something very different passing by your nose.  Was that a fish of a different color?  You feel the need to get that thing out of the lake before it causes the lake to be over run with them.  And you attack it with such a violence, you are even amazed at your abilities to slam it.

But wait!  You are now fighting for your own life.  There is a hook in your mouth and you are battling against a very strong line of some sort.  Your first thought is to break that line.  But to no avail, you are in a net and some dude is taking your picture.  A fish out of water.

Lucky for you, he lets you go back into the lake and you are safe once again.  Did you learn anything?  Of course you did and you will never chase one of those lures again.  What was it?  Check out this link and you will know!

Fishermen around the world are all the same.  Beer and fishing go together like bacon and eggs.  So it’s no wonder someone came up with this lure.

http://www.freewebs.com/nascarjackets/

Bears Butt

April 2012

Tomorrow is April 10 and it’s National Golfers Day.  I don’t know how many reading this are golfers, but I think you should go fishing instead.

Bears Butt

Well it is spring out here in the West and the turkey hunting season is just around the corner.  Well, for those lucky enough to have drawn a Limited Entry tag it is real soon!  For those of us not so lucky, we have to wait until the end of April to start our pursuit.

But that does not lessen the amount of drive in a hunters body.  It’s time to dust off the decoys, sharpen up on the call and do some scouting.  And so, here is a little “get you going” video I found on YouTube.  I was thinking of you when I viewed it.  Enjoy!

Bears Butt

April 9, 2012

This song reminds me of my friend Frank “Gattlin”!  Enjoy this as much as I did!  Heck this could become a great background song.

Happy Easter everyone!  We all know that today is Easter and we are celebrating it in our own ways.  Be safe!  Have fun and enjoy this wonderful Northern Utah weather!  I’ll drink to that!

Get ready also for tomorrow.  You can begin today you know, because tomorrow is “National Name Yourself Day”!  That’s right, you can change your name to whatever you want!  And, don’t get me wrong, I am prepared for you to share with me the name you most likely cherish of all the names you can think of “Bears Butt”!

Go ahead, name yourself after me!  Maybe someday in the future they will change the National Holiday to “National Call Me Bears Butt Day”.  You might want to get yourself some of those stick on name tags like they use at conventions and such and write “Bears Butt” where the blank space is.  Then when people meet you they will read it and say, “Hello, Bears Butt”!  And you will greet them with the same, “Hi, Nice to meet you Bears Butt”!  To me it makes perfect sense.

So, before you head off to your Easter picnic and party, stop in at a dollar store and buy some of those sticky name tags and a magic marker and prepare for tomorrow!

Happy Spring!

Bears Butt

April 8, 2012

I have looked up the stats on this web site and find that a majority of you are women.  I don’t understand why, but for sure more than 50% are you gals!  So, I guess it’s just something you like to waste your time looking at, reading and maybe getting a giggle or two from.  I hope so.

Anyway, this one is for you, and I had nothing to do with it.

April 7 is National “NO HOUSEWORK DAY”!  How about that?

Sleep in!  Tell the old man to deal with the kids and plan on an afternoon with your friends at the restaurant, bar or whatever!  You have until midnight, so enjoy!

I’m posting this up tonight so some of you can enjoy the day beginning at midnight tonight!  A 24 hour time of not worrying about housework!  You gotta love it!  No worry.  It’s a National Holiday…just like the 4th of July!  BANG!  BANG!  BANG!

Enjoy!

Bears Butt

April 2012

I might be sleeping in tomorrow so I decided to post up tonight.

Today (tomorrow actually for me) April, 5th is “National Go For Broke” day!

Did you buy your lottery ticket yesterday (today) for tonights (last nights) drawing?  If not, well today (tomorrow for me) is your chance to spend all you have on tickets and “Go for Broke”!  You CAN DO EEET!

Or if you and the neighborhood are playing for keeps in a one on one, or some other game you usually play…go for the long one for the win!

If you are dating someone and the urge hits…well…

Did you get slapped?

HAHAHAHA!

So Go For Broke!  It’s the day for it.  All your debtors will understand about the late payments.  After all it is a National Holiday isn’t it?  It just hasn’t hit the big time like Easter and Presidents day.  Be the first on your block to have a big old flag made that says “GO FOR BROKE”! and place it on your front lawn.

I wonder where that statement came from?  Maybe we will find out and post it up on here.  If you already know…let me know!

Bears Butt

Not quite April 5th, 2012

Some of you may know and some of you don’t know and still others of you could care less, but my Grandfather was sheriff of Box Elder County, Utah for many, many years.  He was the best!  Look up Sheriff John Henry Osmer Zundel if you would like to know more.

He was a man of integrity, honesty, was good looking, tall and very much just like myself.  Perhaps I inherited all of his traits….well…maybe most of his traits.

Here is a copy of a letter sent to him by an investigator:

You know, being sheriff does not always involve shooting people and such!

Bears Butt

April 4, 2012