CHICKEN SOUP WITH HOME MADE EGG NOODLES

This has to be the easiest and greatest tasting recipe in my arsenal!

EDIT:

Things you will need…boring!

Flour

Salt

Eggs

A boiling pan

Water

Chicken

Onions

Seasonings

Heat source

Hey…did I forget anything?….people!  Never can figure things out for themselves.

Mixing bowl!

Hands!

How far back to you want me to go?  Farmer, field?  Chicken?  Egg?  Wheat seed?  God?

Excuse me.

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First you have to make the noodles because they have to dry,  well, they don’t really have to dry, but the old time recipe I used says they do.  I have since found out they don’t.

For a small batch, like for just one meal for two to four people, mix one cup of all purpose flour (Wheat grinders?) with two eggs, 1 1/2 tablespoons of water and 1 teaspoon of salt. (Miners?)

How easy!

Mix with your hands (that’s the best part) (how often do you get the chance to break an egg yolk with your hand?) keep moving the mixture around gathering up all the loose flour.  When there isn’t any more flour in the bowl you’re done, at least with that part.

Now flour up a cookie sheet or cutting board or your counter top.  Plop that gob of mixed dough on it and spread it out thin with a rolling pin (Wood cutters?).  What if you don’t have a rolling pin?  Roll it with a plastic glass on its side (Plastic glass makers) , the butt of your palm, an unopened soda or beer can on its side (Aluminum miners and smelters?  I’m done with that!)…whatever it takes.

Now, this is important…let it sit for 10 minutes undisturbed…turn off all music in the house and don’t stomp your feet, be very quiet!  If you don’t let it be undisturbed for at least 10 minutes the noodles will be tough as owl crap and you don’t want that.

As it rests you can do the rest of the stuff quietly.

Get a pretty big boiling pan out of the cupboard and fill it about half way full of water.  Get the heat under it and continue to do the next few things.

You are going to need:

Chicken and Onions, salt/pepper/seasonings you like…that’s it! (Well according to some that is NOT it, but I’m writing this and I say…it is (quietly)!).

Cut up a lot of chicken into bit sized pieces, actually you can have them bigger than bite size cuz they will cook and break up later on their own anyway.  Just make sure you don’t have any bones in the mess of meat.  Bones are bad in any soup.  I like to put a ton of chicken in my noodle soup and I especially like to have the skin and fat in there as well (no feathers please).

DR. BEARS BUTT SAYS:  If you are ill, the best “fix you up remedy” is fatty chicken noodle soup with lots of onions in it.  Chicken fat is the Army (fighting mechanism) that combats the ugly bad boys in your body and the onions are the Chicken fats’ shield!  The noodles and chicken pieces are just to help your body get the nourishment you need.  If in a pinch, all you need is the chicken fat and onions boiled up in a broth and you will be well in no time!

Toss in the heap of cut up chicken into the pot of water.

Now get at least 3 large yellow onions out of the cellar and get them peeled and cut up into “shield” sized pieces (1/2 inch, they will shrink to fit the chicken fat sized bodies).  Now I say AT LEAST 3 large yellow onions, because you can add more and it will be better.  Chicken fat and onions…remember that!

DR. BEARS BUTT SAYS:  If the Chicken fat army has too many shields that will be just fine…too few shields is not a good thing for any army!

Put the cut up onions in the pot with the chicken!

Now look at your noodles.  HEY!  They aren’t noodles at all….YET!  Just a flattened out chunk of dough laying there all relaxed and all from not being disturbed!

Grab the pizza cutter and get to work!  Here you can be creative.  If you like to make words out of the dough you can cut words out.  I’d keep them thin, but whatever makes your day go good…do it.  Remember this, as the noodles cook they get thicker and thicker.  Not longer and longer, but thicker and thicker.

(Alphabet soup came from someones imagination and I’m certain they were in charge of making their mom some home made noodle soup when they made the letters out of the dough.  They may have been somewhat delirious from having to care for her and the other kids at the same time, while dad was at work or up at the local tavern.  I really don’t know, but that made a good spin on the whole thing…in my mind.)

So, now the noodles are cut…long, short, fat, thin, numbers, letters, whatever.  Now they need to dry (according to old time recipe I first used)…you can transfer the still gooey noodles over to a cookie pan and put it in the oven on 160 degrees, prop the oven door open with a wood spoon and leave them for about 30 minutes, or you can choose to just ignore them and within about 4 hours they will be crunchy dry.  OR, when you think the chicken and onions are done enough…plop those bad boy noodles right in on top of that boiling stuff and let it all cook away.

SEASONINGS:

I’m a salt freak…at least I used to be…in my older days, now, I use less and less, but still like what salt adds to a mix like this one.  So, with caution, add salt, garlic powder, pepper, season all, parsley flakes and whatever makes your pallet like what you are trying to get into your stomach…go for it!

DR. BEARS BUTT SAYS, Salt is always a good thing to put into your ailing body.  It helps you retain water a bit and for the bad boy germs that are trying to out flank the Chicken fat army, it makes for some slow going in the blood stream.

But go easy on the use of salt, it is bad for a lot of the other parts of your body and has been known to cause cancer in people who live in California.  Don’t ask me for my source of that one.  It just seems like everything that seems good for the rest of the people of the United States causes cancer in people from California…read some labels you’ll understand.

When the chicken is done…test often after 10 minutes of boiling…stir in  the seasonings…a bit of them at a time…taste after the boiling has commenced and stir often…add more…stir…boil…HEY!  Are the noodles dry yet?

Once you have the chicken/onion broth perfectly seasoned…add the noodles!  And let it simmer!  The noodles will absorb the goodness of the broth and make them swell with pride.  You too can swell with pride!  How many people do you know that have made their own noodles?  I’d venture to guess…maybe two!  And how many have made their very own chicken noodle soup from scratch?  I’d bet a six pack…the same two!

The whole mess is done when the noodles are done.  You will know when that is as one of two things will happen!  One:  You are beside yourself as to why the noodles just won’t get soft (because you didn’t give them their quiet time)!  Or Two: You are starved and you just don’t give a dang..you are gonna eat!

Bears Butt

December 22, 2013