I was looking up the National Day for today, June 5 and discovered today is not a National holiday, but rather a festival day.  One that we might all get a kick out of…sort of like reading this site.

Today is “Festival of Popular Delusions” day.

In my extensive research as to the meaning of this day, I find some group of musicians (I guess they are musicians) have an album out with this same name and they must have a pretty good following, because my research could only find them and the name of this album.  Of course, not wanting my security system to come crashing down upon my computer I chose not to enter into any one of their line items.  (They just looked the type to have virus’ hanging all over them).

Well, stranger things have happened, but what happened during my visit to the World Wide Web caused the phone to ring.  Of course it had to be the fact that I wasn’t clicking on their sites that caused the phone to ring and low and behold the name on the caller i.d. was “Saint Gobain”!

Holy mother of all delusions!  Saint Gobain wants to talk to me!

Well, lucky for me, again I did not answer the call, but chose to listen to the voice of Saint Gobain on my answering machine.  And while waiting for the phone to ring its programmed 6 rings, the dear Saint hung up on the fourth one!  Dang!  Another delusion foiled!

So, I looked the good Saint up on the WWW in front of me…A company headquartered in France that makes wild and crazy plastic stuff for all sorts of purposes, including outer space!

And so, there are no accidents in this world and that call was just more proof!  How would any of us known about Saint Gobain and the good they bring to the world?  Call me delusional, but my day has already begun.

Bears Butt

June 5, 2012

I got to thinking after fishing today and having to fill out a form called “Stop the mussels”!  in order to launch my boat.  I knew there was a course on the subject and if you finished the course you would only have to place your “certificate of course completion” on the dash of your vehicle and life would be good.  So, I went to the site and took the course.

https://dwrapps.utah.gov/wex/dbconnection.jsp?examnbr=505728

There is a bunch of short reading sequences and then a series of questions that follow and there are some additional reading that can be had after you answer the questions.

What I learned, was that I did not know very much about these terrible little critters called Quagga and Zebra mussels.  They are very nasty little critters and we should probably all be made to take this course.

Did you know that you HAVE to display a signed and dated form that says you have not boated on certain waters in Utah or other states around Utah BEFORE you can launch a boat, float tube, kids toy tube, raft or ANYTHING that can float?  Me either.

Their definition of a boat is:  If it floats it’s a boat!

Pretty straight forward and the rules that apply to boats also apply to your kids rubber ducky!  You might want to read up on the law or you might face up to a $5,000 fine.  These guys are serious and when you study the effects of the nasty little “mussel” guys, you will see why.

I’m glad I took the time to read and take the test.  By the way, you have to pass with 100%, no matter how long it takes or how many times you take it.

So, keep in mind, before you go off and put that float tube around your waste and head off into deeper water, make sure you have your signed and dated paper on the dash of your vehicle or you might just be facing 6 months in jail and a $5,000 fine.  That applies to any and all water in Utah, be it lake, stream, canal, pond, ditch, public or private.

The law has us tightly by our little Quagga’s and we ain’t gonna be able to Zebra out of it!

Bears Butt

June 2, 2012

Today is a fun national holiday that most of us don’t even know about, National Repeat Day.  I, however, don’t really need a national holiday to have fun with repeat day.  After all, I have friends and family that help remind me, almost daily, that repeating is good for the soul.

I even have one nephew who we renamed our repeat slogan after and later in this writeup you will know who he is.

Yes, I like repeat times and even have to put myself into the saying on occasion.  We do dumb stuff and so the saying goes like this:

“Repeat after me……Ima…..dumbshit”!

Of course the dummy who did whatever it was to call for the “repeat after me” statement only then realizes how dumb it was for he or she to deserve it and of course repeats with good humor.

After many dummy things I really got to know my nephew Brek quite well and so the new saying is:

“Repeat after me…..Ima….BrekBennett”!

Enjoy the national holiday today and remember to repeat things all day.

Enjoy the national holiday today and remember to repeat things all day.

Enjoy the national holiday today and remember to repeat things all day.

Enjoy the national holiday today and remember to repeat things all day.

.yad lla sgniht taeper ot rebmemer dna yadot yadiloh lanoitan eht yoynE

Bears Butt

June 3, 2012

Here you go!  Another fine find by the one and only Bears Butt.  This should shed light on a number of sayings we all have heard and most of us have used.

http://www.snopes.com/language/phrases/holysmoke.asp

But it does not mention one that some of my friends and I use quite a bit:  Holy Chit Man!

Bears Butt

June 2, 2012

I dare anyone reading this to run naked through their yard today.  The weather is perfect for such an activity.

I dare anyone reading this to eat an ice cream cone as fast as they can.  Forget the pain of a brain freeze, just eat the ice cream.

I dare anyone reading this to offer to mow the neighbors lawn, using your own lawn mower and gas of course, but while doing it, change the height of the mower on one side.  Your neighbor will love not having to mow his lawn this week.

I dare anyone reading this to stand on a corner with a sign that reads, “I don’t want to work, that’s why I’m here”!

I dare anyone reading this to challenge this day as National Dare Day!  I Double Dog Dare you!

Bears Butt

June 1, 2012

Bears Butt can find some interesting things when he goes looking.  He found this excerpt from a diary from one of the companies that crossed the plains into the Utah Territory.  You too might find it interesting.

Mormon Pioneer Overland Travel, 1847–1868

Source of Trail Excerpt:

Wood, Lyman Stephen, Autobiographical sketch 1901, 55-58.

Read Trail Excerpt:

It was the 16th day of May 1848, my father with his family and that of Milo Andrus, together with many others again left their homes to proceed on their journey to the rocky mountainsWe continued our travels from day to day nothing of special note other than the usual camp duties, until one night while we were encamped along side of the Platte river, our wagons forming one side, the river the other, with several hundred acres in the enclosure thus made, Our stock were all placed in there, so as to secure them from any attacks that might be made on them by the indians. The guards or sentinels were placed along outside the line of wagons, with orders to walk their beat first one way then the other until they would meet a fellow guard and report to him of any occurence note worthy. It was orders for guard no 1 to cry out the time of night, every half hour, then no 2 and no 3 and so on until the report that all was well went the entire length of the line every half hour. Each successive guard repeating what the former one had reported. The writer of this happened to be near guard quarters where sentinel no 1 was placed and close to sentinel no 2 who passing on his beat came near a wagon where the owner and his family were supposed to be sleeping as most all the wagons were slept in, one nearby was occupied by a man by the name of Gates, who it seems at this particular moment was indulging in a very fierce dispute with his wife, sentinel no 1 called the time like this, half past ten o, clock and all is well, sentinel no 2 who was very near to Mr. Gates wagon, heard the conversation in there, cried out, half past 10 o, clock, and all is well, “except Gates and his wife are quarreling like hell. Sentinel no 3 reported and so on all down the line which was nearly a mile in length. This publicity was heard by the entire camp who were not already asleep, and didn’t hear the cries of the sentinels. This affair caused a considerable amount of amusement for the next few days. Our camp was large there being something over six hundred wagons and when strung out in line of march would reach something like three or four miles. While travelling up the Platt[e] river when it was thought feasible, in many places we formed two lines for better protection from assault by the indians. Our travel was necessarily very slow many days not covering more than from five to ten miles. One of the greatest difficulties we had to contend with, was the great scarcity of wood, we were compelled to resort to the use of the dried droppings of the buffalo, (that had recently passed along) commonly called, “Buffa[lo] chips” We encountered many very severe electrical storms, thunder and such sharp lightning, every few days at which time the “buffa[lo] chips” became so wet, we had great difficulty in starting fires to cook our food. It was truly a novel as well as an amusing sight many times when our captain would give orders for all to prepare for camping for the night. To see women and children leaving their wagons, scattering in every direction to gather the indispensable buffalo chips, some getting baskets full and some sacks full. Some of the women would gather their aprons full, some in their arms, as long as they could be piled on, many times holding the last piece in place with their chin. Nothing of special importance transpiring other than the usual routine.   Bears Butt May 31, 2012