Old Tracker now, he’s been around some.  Traveled the old Stinky up in Alaska country, even the Yukon, but aint had no trip like the one down the Big Bend of the Bear.

Tracker says the Bear River is the only river in these here U.S. where its beginin and end is so near it makes her sumpin special.  Guess we’ll read about it some day.

Anyhow, we was up near the Big Bend country one summer.  A place where there is sodie water comin right out ‘o the ground.  Dangedest thing you ever seed.  We decided to go float down the Big Bend of the Bear to see what was down it.

Now Mountain Men aint got no money, but what we got is mostly good.  So we conjured us up a free boat.  Kind of flat agin the water, and wide across from front ta back.  Anyhow, we find ourselves floatin down the river singin , “Al a wet a!  Shonta al a wet a”!

We was havin fun.  Us and that ol river.  Sundenly we heard the sound of a water fall or sompin.  We scrambled fer sticks to get to shore, but it were too late, we was caught in the swift current.  Bein as brave as we could we steered her into mid stream and down we went.  Through the suck we went and out the other side, white water for yards beyond.  Ya, we got wet some, but we made it.

After that twernt much river citment, but we sure did see lots of game.  We’d of taken some bulls had we seed’em but all we saw was cows and lots of ‘em.  I suspect the bulls was back in the shade someplace.

One thing certain, as we come silent down the current and rounded a bend we seed the dangest thing ever.  River Geese!  They came off the shore with only they’s bodies, got inta the river and swam with us.  Their heads was three feet infornta theys bodies, but they had NO NECKS!!!  I aint never and probably won’t agin see such a sight.

We beached the fee boat a couple times that day to relieve ourselves, and is sure came as a surprise when we found ourselves sufferin from “Big Boatknees”, sometimes called “Sneesles”.  It’s an ailin that causes the legs to go ta sleep from the knees to the toas and causes ya ta stumble and fall a lot when ya git outa a free boat.

Al a wet a!  Shonta al a wet a!

We was havin a real good time checkin things out, when off the bank come a bunch of Americans to help us, guess they didn’t like our singin.  Grabbed our raft in the swift current which caused it to flip and into the deep river we went.  All our possible was drownin and up we come under the boat.  Course them Americans thought we was drownin.  Kept  grabbin  at  us  as  we drifted until we nearly did drown.

Well, we made her, and won’t never fergit the trip down the Big Bend of the Bear!

Bears Butt

May-Jun 1990