On a trip to central California a few years back, Sherry and I found ourselves at cousin Mike and Ilenes place.  Staying there while we were visiting was my Aunt LeOra.  A very lovely lady who carries herself with pride and dignity.  She is very well educated and a kind and gentle soul.  She has worked hard her entire 97 years and raised her children with respect and caring as well.  She is very well liked by all who have ever met her.  She is graceful and very beautiful in appearance.  Spirited like only a few.  A strong belief in God and all that He stands for.

When one speaks of Aunt LeOra visions of grandeur and grace fills the mind.  Kindness and caring, sharing and comfort all come into play as well.  Aunt LeOra is everything a child looks for in a parent and a grandchild looks for in a grandparent.  The perfect mold of what a person on earth should be..well almost…there was this ONE time….let me tell you about it.

Our visit began with a night spent with another cousin, Marlin.  Marlin is a daughter from my Uncle John and Aunt Irma.  Marlin lives in a very respectful neighborhood nestled in and around a very nice golf course near where this story began.  Marlin was happy Sherry and I were coming out to California, because Willardites NEVER leave Willard and yet here we were.  She was so pleased she even went out and purchased me a new set of “Red Flannel Underwear”, an had them hanging  outside her home as a welcome flag when we drove up!  You may think that was not a very nice thing to do, but for this here mountain man that was about the nicest thing anyone could have done.  Sort of a common flag of welcome home!  We all know that mountain men with any dignity at all wear red flannel underwear and those that don’t have either not found any, or have wrought there way into the savage ways of loin cloths and other such savage wearings.

I thank you very much cousin Marlin for such a very kind jesture and gift!  I wear them  at every rendezvous and on the deer hunts and winter outings I go to.  They are high quality and very warm.

Back to Aunt LeOra.

From Marlins home we advanced to Ilene’s for continued vacation fun.  Finding Aunt LeOra there was such a treat.  We had no idea she would be there and thought that visiting her home was going to be a part of our adventure.  But, even though we did go and visit her “Paradise” before our trek took us toward home, we had a WONDERFUL visit with her at Ilenes’.  A longer visit than perhaps SHE wanted.  You see, the Willarditeness never leaves a Willardite and when we found ourselves deep in the bowels of California, surrounded by Californiaites we knew we were in for a great time.  We have all read the warnings on several of the items we purchase that says something like: “Has been known to cause ‘some dreadful thing’ in people in California”.  Well perhaps this story should have come with a warning.

One evening we had had a wonderful barbeque meal and several cold drinks and we were laughing and cutting up.  Even had a visit from Sir Butt.  The conversation got around to mountain man things and eventually out came the Red Flannel underwear that Marlin had given me!  I politely asked gracious Aunt LeOra if she would like to try them on.

“Oh My”! , she said with a gasp, “A LADY does NOT wear such clothing”!  Ok.  I’m Ok with that.  After all it was rude of my asking, but then that is just my character.  And I might add, she is the same lady who told her daughter Ilene they would have to take her burial garments back to the store because they were “Dry Clean Only”!  How could I have been so rude to her?  It must have been the beer.  Yes!  The beer!

We went to bed on a cheerful note and slept well.  The neighborhood police had surrounded the entire block and made sure the Willardites stayed locked up.

The next morning out in Mike and Ilene’s back yard (such a beautiful place it is, with squirrels, birds of all California kinds and  fragrent flowers abounding) I sat , in my red flannels, sipping a cup of MoJo and just plain enjoying the beautiful morning.  When suddenly, the sliding glass door bursts open and there, LO AND BEHOLD,  stood my gracious Aunt LeOra with nothing on but my Red Flannel Underwear!  GASP!!!!  A LADY does NOT wear such clothing!!!!!!  But there she was, the same gracious, caring, loving person actually WEARING that set of red flannel underwear.  She looked pretty good in them too.

Well, you know me!  I’m not afraid to tell you I look pretty dang good in my red flannel underwear, and so the two of us must look doubly good in our red flannel underwear, so pictures were taken.

NOW, before you get to see the picture of the two of us, you must swear to secrecy not to tell the bishop of her ward, nor the ladies of the ward,  or anyone else that might take this as her falling from her well deserved pedestal and cause her grief.  She is too sweet to do that to.  Let’s just say we two Willardites brought wrath and uneasiness to the California Natives and caused some of her medications to fail.

Ladies and Gentlemen (say that with the tone and enunciation of a sports casters voice)!  I now present you with Aunt LeOra and the Bears Butt! (same voice)

What a wonderful, great sport she is!

Bears Butt

June 17, 2011