By: Bears Butt

For all us coin finders this is a great day!  It’s National Penny Day!  So when you are walking into or out of Walmart today, look down and hopefully you will find a penny!  And if you do, pick it up and celebrate like it was a million dollars.  People who watch and hear you will think you are nutso, but so what?  You are celebrating the finding of someone elses loss and the wonderful National holiday it is!

WOOOPPPPEEEE!  I FOUND A PENNY!  (dance around)  YAAAAHHOOOOO!  A PENNY!  I FOUND A PENNY!  IT’S YOUR DAY PENNY!  (keep dancing and working your way to the car or to the front door of the store).  And then tuck it in your LEFT pocket!  Left pocket so you keep it separated from the rest of the coins in your pocket.  After all it is a very special penny.  You found it on National Penny Day and it should be kept separate from all the others.

A secret I have found about coins, especially pennys.  If you really, really, really, really want to find a penny, go to a McDonalds drive through window area, those kids who drive through there picking up their big meal, fries and a coke, toss those bad boys all over the ground!  Almost GUARANTEED you will find a penny around that window.  Maybe look on the passenger side of the car and perhaps a bit toward the outer curb where then tend to roll once dropped.  Oh Ya!

National Penny Day!  Put one in your shoe for good luck.  But as a word of caution don’t do that if you are in a marathon race or hiking any distance.

Enjoy the day!  National Penny Day!  I knew a girl named Penny when I grew up.

Bears Butt

May 23, 2012

Written on May 23rd, 2012 , Uncategorized
By: Bears Butt

It’s that glorious time of the year when the state of Utah announces who can hunt big game in the Fall.  I’ll let you know right now that I, one of many, have drawn a muzzleloader deer tag and I’m a bit pumped to think I will be hunting and carrying a weapon of choice.

It is a nice feeling to be “in the circle of winners” for this lottery.  But what about those outside the circle?  A bad feeling for sure and we have one of our group who’s credit card has not been hit as of this writing.  Sorry Crock!  I hope it’s just a fluke and your credit card will show a deduction before bedtime tonight.  Even if it doesn’t don’t give up hope.  Someone who did draw may opt out of the hunt and open up the tag just for you!

One of my favorite forum web sites is the Utah Wildlife Net .net and there are a great bunch of guys that post up on that forum.  One even put a thread out there for the “unchosen” and there are a lot of tears on that thread.  One guy came on with a winning lottery statement and was chastised severely for it. Rightfully deserved.

But for us lucky dogs who drew the coveted “whatever” tag we wanted the most for this falls hunting it is a wonderful time.  Just before rendezvous and we have bragging rights at the camp.  The unlucky probably won’t even show up to the camp…all hung dog and sad you know.  I would not blame them.  Why throw yourself in front of a bunch of happy faces and bragging dudes and dudetts who lucked out .  Stay home and be comforted by the spouse about how much money you will save etc.

As for me, I’m glad I drew out, but I would have still gone on the hunt, just to be in camp and maybe get the chance to gut someone elses deer.  But at least be out there gathering up the smoke from the fire into the fabric of my clothes and stinking of the stale smell of beer.  I love the hunt!  I love the camp!  I love the cold beer!  I love the outing and the friends and the animals and the mountains and watching the first of the leaves to begin to fall.  YES!

And then there are the ULTRA lucky!  The ones who put in for the “general” hunt stuff, but also put in for coveted tags that limit the entry of people into a given area of mountain turf and only they can carry a weapon and hunt the game.  THEY are the luckiest of the lucky!  And talk about bragging rights!  They outshine the lucky general tag winners by MILES!  And their smiles show it.

Whenever someone around the fire says “did you draw out”?  They break out into the big old smile that comes with being so very lucky and they hesitate just a moment before speaking about the quest that took them decades to finally draw.  We have two of them in our group who drew such a tag.  No Grimace and Baby Boy!  The Lucky Lucky ones.

With such a feat of luck, they now have choices to make.  What should their shirts say?  A few years ago the shirt read “The Chosen Ones”.  Last year the shirt said “The Chosen ONE”!  Does this years shirt read “The Chosen Pair”?  “The Chosen Two”?  “Dos Elegido, the two chosen”?  Only they can decide.

Yes folks, we are going back into the Crawford Mountains to once again try and educate some of those Wyoming deer.

Bears Butt

May 22, 2012

Written on May 22nd, 2012 , DREAM HUNTS
By: Bears Butt

Making my lovely wife breakfast this morning got me thinking about eggs.  As I smacked two eggs together and one of the shells broke, I separated the shells and the egg plopped out onto the pan, I did it again with the same result and after three were in the pan, I had only one left and so I smacked it against the counter top.  I could have used the edge of the pan, but chose not to.  So there I had four eggs resting in the pan as it heated.

My mind races sometimes and this time it was really going strong.  Thinking to myself, I wonder if there is a world record for the number of eggs one egg has cracked before its own shell cracks?  I’ll bet that one has not been attempted yet.  If this gives you an idea to get the Guiness guys together go for it.  I’d like to see the results.  I’ll bet a beer you won’t get 10 eggs cracked before the one doing the cracking cracks.  Are we on?

So, of course after breakfast I attacked the internet to find out my answer.  Now, you must consider I am doing this for you as much as for myself because I seem to have more time on my hands than you do for such important things such as this.

I did not find anything that talked about using one egg to crack a bunch of other eggs.  So, I’m fairly certain you could easily get into the record book.  What I did find was these useful bits of information.

In order to enter into an egg cracking exhibition you have to know some basic rules.  You need to use both hands if you are going for a record of the number of eggs cracked in one hour.  However, you can use just one hand if you are going for the record of eggs cracked in one minute.

In both events, NO EGG SHELLS can enter into the pan/bowl or whatever during the time.

Pretty simple and straight forward rules.  I would expect the same to be true while using one egg to crack as many others as you can.  Just keep that in mind.

Ok, so back in 2011 the record for the total number of eggs cracked in one hour was broken by Bob Blumer.  That guy was an egg cracking sucker let me tell you.  He cracked a total of 2,318 eggs in one hour!  Of course using both hands and cracking without getting shells in the bowl.  When the judges got together they tossed out 248 cracked eggs because of shells and so the record stands at 2,070!

Also, in 2011, (it must have been the year of the egg) a man named Ross McCurdy broke the record of eggs cracked in one minute.  He cracked eggs in one hand and then in the other.  Like a machine he cracked eggs and plopped them into a bowl.  Like a young Dry Dog at the Red Baron Cafe making breakfast for the threshers, he cracked eggs!  32 eggs fell without so much as an inkling of an egg shell!  Now that’s crackin!

So, there you have it and you don’t even have to go anywhere else to seek out this information.  I have done the research for you and you are certainly allowed to quote this in any assignment you may have in your future.

I think you really should proceed with the record of the most eggs cracked using one other egg.  I found no record of that anywhere!

Bears Butt

May 22, 2012

Written on May 22nd, 2012 , Uncategorized
By: Bears Butt

Today is a weird national holiday, National Buy A Musical Instrument Day.  HMMMMM.  I suppose all the music shops around the country will be flooded with folks looking to buy a jaw harp or a violin, but not for me.  I have all the musical instruments I think I can play.

Duck call, goose call, rabbit in distress call, 3 different turkey calls and of course my air guitar.  That’s enough.

Wanna hear me play?  Quack, Honk, wwaaahhhaaahhaaaaaa queealllll, yelp, yelp, yelp, yelp, well she broke my hort at wallgreens and I cried all the way ta sears!

Boy howdy, THAT IS ENOUGH!

Have a great day and don’t forget to visit the Deseret Industries store, they usually have a boat load of musical instruments for sale, and cheap too.

Bears Butt

May 22, 2012

Written on May 22nd, 2012 , Uncategorized
By: Bears Butt

Yesterdays lunar eclipse had me wondering just how I was going to view it.  I recalled many, many years ago, an hobby astrologist I worked with brought in a box one day and we were able to set it up in the parking lot at work and view an eclipse.  I went to work looking up how it was done on line.

The on line help said I needed to build a box a minimum of 6 feet long!  That seemed a bit much to me and I did not recall my astrologist friend having a box that long.  And so, I decided all I needed was a short box and an end with a pin hole in it.  I could cast the suns light on something far enough away to make it visible and hopefully we could see the shadow of the moon as it crossed in the suns path.

About 6:45 p.m. Brandon called and I told him what I was up to.  He wanted to come and see and so, it wasn’t but a couple of minutes and here were the kids to see.  I did not realize just how quickly the eclipse would take place.  I figured we had plenty of time.  We headed out to find a likely spot to set up our pin hole box.

Luckily for us there was an old metal door laying in the metal recycle pile we could use to project the sun against and when we set it up…wholey moley, the eclipse was already happening.

McKenzie and Conner had to get into the picture and I’m glad they did.  Proof that I was not alone in this adventure.

And so, with camera clicking away I was able to capture some of the images of the moon passing between the earth and the sun.  Remember, this image is reverse of what you would have seen if you could have looked directly at the sun.  It’s sure a lot easier on the eyes than looking directly into the sun and we did not have to use welders masks or plastic garbage bags to view the event.

This was the first picture and you can see we were late getting into the action.  So for next time I will be setting things up at least 45 minutes before the total eclipse happens, maybe sooner.

And so, even though the pictures aren’t that good, at least you can see what we saw by using just a pin hole in a piece of aluminum foil and rabbit ears over our head.

We did this in Northern Utah on May 20.  The total eclipse was seen about half way through the state to the South.  They got to witness the “ring of fire” as it’s called, but we were too far north to see that.  We still had fun and it did not cost us anything to go down there.  This sort of thing is not dangerous, it is informative, somewhat scientific and fun.

Bears Butt

May 21, 2012

Written on May 21st, 2012 , Uncategorized
By: Bears Butt

Today marks the National celebration of Eliza Doolittle but unlike her last name Eliza really did quite a bit.  Of course she had a whole lot of help doing it.  Sort of like Bears Butt.  I have a lot of stage crew that keep my image high (in your mind at least), why else would you keep hanging around this site reading the obscure?

Behinds the scenes of Eliza’s life are people of eloquence and grace.  She, after all was just a poor, almost homeless lass who barely could speak the language and be understood.  She was not very clean in her early days as she didn’t have the advantages of the richer folks and therefore had to take cold baths when ever that occasion presented itself.  How often would you take a cold bath?  I too would rather put up with smelling and being dirty until I just couldn’t stand myself before venturing into a cold bath.  Kind of like being on the muzz hunt with a bunch of guys.

She could speak the language, but was really rough and talked “street talk” quite well.  Since she was a girl, the boys gave her a wide range.  She could handle herself well with the roughest of the boys out there.  But, when she came into favor with a rich woman who could see she was a blossoming lass, the best of the best of teachings were thrown her way and she learned quickly just how to say the words properly and how to carry herself among the well to do.

I’m a lot like that myself, only pretty much self trained.  Notice how I swagger when wearing my leathers.  Not too closely boys!  I like girls.  Notice how my language changes with whom I’m speaking.  Notice how I know just what to say and when to say it.  Some of you might think I have had just a few too many bubblies, but I almost always remember what went on.  Just a spoon full of sugar you know.

Eliza Doolittle, went from a street lass to a high class lady in less than the time it takes Bears Butt to draw a Crawford tag.  And her countenance was quite the opposite of one who might have heard, “Your countenance makes time stand still”!  (In other words, you are so ugly, you could stop a clock).  She was a beauty in every way.

As for Bears Butt in this parody, I may not be the most handsome, I may not be the most intelligent, I may not be the tallest, the thinnest or have perfect teeth, but I will offer you a drink and tell you a story.  Did I every mention about the “Rain in Spain falling mainly on the plain”?

Bears Butt

May 20, 2012


Written on May 20th, 2012 , Uncategorized
By: Bears Butt

There aren’t many days left of the 2012 general turkey hunt here in Utah, but this morning the Weasel, Conner and I are off to see if we can out wit one of those elusive gobblers.  We have been close to him in the past, but every time he has slipped through our grubby little fingers.  Maybe today he will make that fatal mistake and take a load of number 6’s in the head.

We have a plan!

Sneak in, set up, stay quiet and wait.

Well that all sounds great doesn’t it?  How can three guys, one old, one middle age and one 10 years old sneak in?  Perhaps we will walk in as if we were a small herd of cattle or a band of deer.  Once into our spot we can settle down and stop making the walking sounds humans are known for.

Ok, that part is figured out.  Now for the next…stay quiet…right!  Candy wrappers, shuffling cold feet, runny noses.  It’s no wonder turkeys figure out there is something up that they don’t want to go into that thicket of brush to investigate and if they do, they come through the nastiest of the nasty to peak around.  So, in order to get around all of the little noises, I will conveniently leave the granola bars back in the truck and only have some jerky in my pocket.  That should work.  Oh and a napkin for each of us to put in our pocket to wipe our noses.  Yesterdays rain should help with the rustling of the leaves under our cold feet.  Perhaps a few of those open, rub and hold hand warmers, that should do to calm the cold.

Wait.  Now that is the key!  Waiting can sometimes get very un-nerving, but in all my reading, the lessons told by our friend Tex-O-Bob last weekend and everyone who has ever killed a gobbler, they all point to patience as the one key to killing a gobbler.  I’m a guy who likes to run and gun.  See the bird and go get it.  Sitting in the cool of the morning waiting for the unknown bird to come slipping in…..I’m not sure about all of that.  But, we only have a few hours this morning to get it done, so perhaps we can pull it off.

Our wary gobbler friend has been slipping it to us the past couple of weeks and maybe today we can get closer for a shot.  His pattern is wider than our shotguns at 30 yards, but we know “about” where he likes to strut his stuff.  If we can get his interest up enough to peak into the place we plan to hide and see our decoy, he might decide he likes our little “Gretchen” and come closer for a lookee-see.  BOOM!

I’ll let you know how it plays out later.

Bears Butt

May 19, 2012


A beautiful morning!  There were a ton of people doing the same thing as we were, but no body got any shooting.  We did not see any turkeys today, but we did have at least two different toms gobbling.  Not a ton of gobbling, but enough to keep the interest up.  Had they been on their regular routine I think we would have been in the right spot!

I did have a small buck deer and a doe play with me.  He bedded down about 20 yards away and kept me from moving.  She came in about an hour later and bedded about 10 feet away.  When the winds began to swirl, both deer jumped up and decided I was not a friendly sort.  But then, they continued to try and figure out what I was.  They would turn their heads as if uninterested and then suddenly turn back to see if I was moving.  It was quite funny to watch.  Then they both just walked away.  I was glad to see them go because my butt was so sore from sitting without moving for over two hours.

A wonderful day in the woods.

Bears Butt

P.M. report

Written on May 19th, 2012 , Hunting/Fishing/Trapping Stories
By: Bears Butt

Have you ever wondered what it is they put in propane fuel that smells so bad?  Well, yours truely has done all the research you need on the subject and I’m here to share it with you right now.

Chemically speaking it’s a combination of a Thiol group and a Ethyl group.  Ethyl groups are groups that have multiple Carbon atoms, while the Thiol groups have Sulphur atoms.  It’s quite easy if you do a bit of study.  You see the Ethyl compound is stated as CH3CH2, clearly two atoms of Carbon (C) and 5 atoms of Hydrogen (H) and the Thiol group is simply one atom of Sulpher and one atom of Hydrogen or SH…combine the two and you have the existence of some very stinky stuff CH3CH2SH.

Now I’m not a chemist but in my little pea brain I can not seem to understand why those little C’s and H’s don’t get together and make the whole thing C2H6S, that seems like it would stink even more than CH3CH2SH.  I mean sound it out:

CHCHSHHHHHH  vs CUHUSSSSSSS  The later sound just sounds more smelly to me.  Maybe I’m a little hard of hearing, but it just does sound more smelly.  And if you were to be attempting to hook up your BBQ to the propane tank and you kept smelling that nasty odor time after time of trying to get it connected without any leaks, you would be cussing up a storm, right!  That would be smelly!  Now look again at the sounds…which is closest to “cussing”?  Of course, CuHuSSSSSS (cussssss).

Ok, I’ve kept you in suspense long enough, the word for the additive that smells so bad that they add to propane and other odorless gases is called Ethyl Mercaptan:  Ethyl = Ethyl Group, Mercaptan = Thiol Group.

In my extensive research, I also found where the Guiness Book of World Records lists Ethyl Mercaptan as the “foulest smelling substance in the world”.  I suppose it could be, but have you ever smelled yourself after a “you know” while wearing chest waders?  I guess the Guiness folks would have had to of been there.

Ethyl Mercaptan, that’s what you are smelling, not propane, it don’t stink.

Bears Butt

May 18, 2012

Written on May 18th, 2012 , Uncategorized
By: Bears Butt

One happy thing after another!  I’m still flying high from Conners guided turkey hunt and already more good things are coming down.  My credit card was hit for the amount of a deer tag, so that pretty much assures I’ll be packing a rifle on the muzzy hunt this fall!  But better than that, No Grimace and Baby Boy have just announced that No Grimaces’ credit card was hit for an amount equal to two tags for the Crawford Mountains!  WAHOOOOOO!!!!!  Another adventure into the Crawfords for the Willow Creek Free Trappers.  That will make 3 years in a row!  Can those deer handle that?

Can you remember back two years ago when 5 of us drew the tag?  There was an earthquake happen the same day we were notified and the epicenter was in the heart of the Crawford range!  Coincidence?  I think not!  And the end result of the hunt looked like this:

And then last year Dry Dog drew the tag with only 2 points!  Un-heard of.  He has to be one of the luckiest Dog’s I know!  While No Grimace and Baby Boy had to settle for an “unsuccessful” email from the DWR and they went into the drawing with 12 points!  Bummer Dude for them, but one Happy Dog on the other side of the fence!  Smilin like he was just tossed a big old steak bone!  And the season ended with his big smile holding up a very nice big boy only the Crawfords can provide!

And so the story for 2012 is beginning to unfold!  It’s early yet, but the time will pass quickly, as it always does and then we will “suddenly” find ourselves once again facing the elements and the wiley bucks of the Crawfords!

OOOOOOOOOOOOO!  I’m so giddy right now!

Congrats to No Grimace and Baby Boy!  It’s about time you drew the coveted tag!  And I hope you two aren’t too picky about who shares the mountain with you….I WANNA COME AND PLAY!

Bears Butt

May 18, 2012

Written on May 18th, 2012 , DREAM HUNTS
By: Bears Butt

It’s National Visit Your Relatives day!  When I announced it, Sherry said, “At the cemetery”?  Well, I guess you could do that, but I was thinking about the living ones.

It’s currently quite rainy outside, something we really needed and I suppose some of our deceased relatives had something to do with that.  Perhaps it was their way of paying us a visit!  It sure has brought a smile to my face!

So to all of you “my relatives”, even if I don’t get to see you face to face, consider this a visit from the old Bears Butt!


Bears Butt

May 18, 2012

Written on May 18th, 2012 , Uncategorized | Stories, Ramblings & Random Stuff From an Old Mountain Man is proudly powered by WordPress and the Theme Adventure by Eric Schwarz
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Just some of my old stories, new stories, and in general what is going on in my life.