By: Bears Butt

ATVCocoon2 copy

This picture looks like Bears Butt is ready for some wet weather.  Actually he is and this coat he has on is called “The Cocoon”.  A few guys from Idaho (I think) came up with the idea and it’s pretty neat.  You install snaps on the fenders of your ATV that coincide with the snaps on the rubber coat.  The snaps hold the “coat” in position and there are some weights on the bottom of the coat, near your feet that hold that part of the coat down.  The cuffs of the coat are adjustable to fit snug around your wrists and the zipper comes right up to your chin.  A hood holds snugly against your head and only your eyes can be showing if that is all you want to show.  The whole idea of it is to capture the heat from the engine of your machine to keep the driver toasty warm on a cold and wet day afield.  I love my Cocoon!

Now I have a story for you:

Hunter, Weasel, Edjukateer, Crock and I were on an any bull elk hunt and were given permission to hunt a private ranch.  The elk didn’t hang out on this ranch too often, but they used it to travel from one spot to another and we had a very good chance of filling a tag or two.  This property is right on the fringe of the Uinta Mountains of Utah.  The elk live in the high country during the summer and when the winds bring the snow to the high country of the Uintas down they come and winter near this nice little piece of heaven where we have permission to hunt.

We put our camp in a place where it would be fairly easy to get out should a big snow storm hit but it also called for a bit of a long ride in the cold and wet.  Enter Cocoon man!

One morning, as I was loading up and donning my cocoon, Hunter laughed and said that there would be no way for me to get to my rifle should an elk suddenly appear in front of me.  I said…That is ok, there isn’t going to be any elk run in front of me and besides if there were I’m sure I would figure a way to get to my gun for the shot.  At least I would be dry and warm.

You see, this particular morning it was snowing pretty good and it was the type of snow that wets everything and gets deep and deep very fast.  We all put on our warmest of warm hunting clothes and hopped aboard our machines.  Off we went!

With snow pounding in my eyes (the only visible part of me outside my cocoon) I turned my machine up the road where I had picked for that mornings hunt.  Hunter, Weasel, Edjukateer and Crock went on their ways to their pre-picked spots.  When I arrived at my spot I could barely see maybe 20 yards it was snowing so very hard.  I decided to park my atv right in the trail and sit there while it got light enough to see.  I was watching a saddle that we had seen elk tracks crossing over the night before.  The snow was about 6 inches deep and getting deeper with every passing minute.

I sat there just as still as I could listening and watching, trying my best to pick out any kind of movement in front of me.  I really didn’t care much about what might be behind me because it would have had to be right on top of me in order to see it anyway because of the brush next to the trail.  My focus was to my front.  The snow kept up its falling and pretty soon you could not see my atv tracks in the snow.  They were full of snow.  I also mentally noted how much snow was on my cocoon and the toy I was sitting on, but how very warm I was still even after sitting there for nearly an hour.  I was dry and warm.  Visibility was still only about 30 yards and I knew the sun rise had taken place at least a half hour ago.

Soon, through the snow and foggy view, I could hear the faint putting of a coupe of atv’s.  It must be the others coming to find me.  They are probably ready to get back to camp to warm up and dry their clothes.  I have the upper hand on that situation…I’m dry and warm.  I grinned to myself.  And the noises kept getting closer and closer.  Soon, at the very edge of my visibility I could see two atv’s coming up the trail towards me.  Yep, it looks like Hunter and Edjukateer.  They got closer and closer and I could see their 4 wheelers were pushing snow underneath.  I has really snowed a lot, I thought to myself.  But I didn’t move and they continued to get closer.

At about 40 yards out, I could see it was NOT Hunter and Edjukateer, but two other hunters I did not know.  I sat perfectly still as they approached and as they did, I thought, I will have a good time with this situation.  How dare they intrude on my private property hunting location.  I continued sitting upright with all that snow covering my cocoon and machine.  Only my eyes appearing out of the white of the snow.  The lead man suddenly slowed as he finally saw me and brought his machine towards mine at a crawl, put, put, put until his machine was nearly touching mine.  His eyes locked onto mine and he set his brake.  The second man, stopped behind the first about 10 feet back and just sat there staring at me.

The first man slowly began to dismount his machine, still not taking his eyes off of mine.  I sat motionless.  My mind raced as to what to do as I knew this guy was thinking something weird has happened, but still I sat without motion, eyes open and watching him as he approached.

When he got to the front of my toy, I shook off all the snow and said, “HELLO”!!!!

The man grabbed his chest, bent over with a big let out of breath and said, “Oh God!  I thought I had found a dead man”!!!!!  He spun around to face his friend who was also holding his chest and then we all started to laugh.

When the laughing was over we introduced ourselves and I apologized for my joke.  They thought it was a good joke even at their expense and we shared some jerky before they went on their way.

My cocoon!  I love it!

Bears Butt

September 18, 2014


Leave A Comment, Written on September 18th, 2014 , Hunting Stories
By: Bears Butt

MuzzyGunSix days until the hunt.  What have I done to get ready?

Well, considering we are taking a few of the camp trailers up in the morning to establish our camp site, I have had a time trying to think of what to take now and what to take later.  We are planning on camping Friday through early Sunday and then coming home, only to go back on Tuesday morning with the rest of the gang.

Since this is a non-shooting time, no guns are being taken and since there is a limited entry elk hunt going on in the area it would not be a good idea to do any shooting anyway.  How would you feel if after 15 or more years of putting in for a limited entry elk hunt and then while you were hunting some dipstick was target shooting near where you were hunting.  I would not be happy if it were me.

The trailer for the toys is ready….I greased the bearings, puffed up the tires and made sure the bolts and screws were all tight.  And also checked the lights…..everything is ready to go!

I went over my list of things to bring and checked it twice, maybe four times and now it’s loaded in Weasels camp trailer ready for the trip.  I have over packed for sure, but who knows, I just might need some of it.

The weather is calling for a very good chance of rain tomorrow and then again on Monday.  Temps are going to moderate from the near record heat we are having right now and being up in the mountains it will probably feel cold.  I have my capote as well as another coat and a rain jacket if needed.  I even put the “cocoon” on the toy just for fun, you never know when a butterfly might pop out.

I have sharpened all my hunting knives, trying my best to get them all sharpened at a 17 degree angle…..razor sharp angle.  I have got to be careful as they are beginning to cut the leather sheaths.

Since this is my first hunting trip without my own camp trailer, I have been wondering the whole time about how Dry Dog and this “Dog House” is packed.  Has he lit his refer to get it cold?  Is he prepared with coffee, pot and cups?  Does he have plenty of propane?  Water?  Cooking pans and pots?  Lighters?  Potty paper and chemicals?  All these things I have neatly packed away in my camp trailer but I can’t help but wonder….I guess, since everything beyond my rifle and license is a luxury…..why am I worrying at all!

Liver bucket?  Got it!  Rope?  Got it!  Gambril?  Got it!  $5 for the big buck contest?  Got it!

Looks like it’s time to go!

Bears Butt

September 18, 2014

Leave A Comment, Written on September 18th, 2014 , Hunting Stories
By: Bears Butt

I watched this yesterday and thought maybe someone who visits this site might like to know about this:

Leave A Comment, Written on September 17th, 2014 , Uncategorized
By: Bears Butt


Last night a new addition was added to “The Rack”!  An important aid for people with a handicap, like me, short.  A few weeks ago, Crock called up Weasel and asked him if he would be interested in some Step Sideboards for his truck.  Seems the guys in the warehouse were about to throw them away and he could have them at no cost to him.  Of course free stuff is always good and he took Crock up on the offer.

Well, since Crock delivered them, they have been laying out in his driveway getting bumped and worse.  Remembering them last night, I called Weasel up and asked if he was ever going to install them….he brought the truck and the sideboards right up to my place.  It didn’t take us very long to figure out what we had to do to get them installed and we went right to work.  Less than an hour later they were on!


Check them babys out!

The Rack is ridin in style!  And the fact that the truck sits so high in the air, these will assist short people get into and out of the truck with ease.


29inchlift copy


Oh and for you who are wondering what is in store during the hunt…there is a hint on the hood of the truck in one of these pictures.  10 days till the hunt!

Bears Butt

September 14, 2014

1 Comment, Written on September 14th, 2014 , Hunting Stories
By: Bears Butt

ButtMobileReady copyThe latest stories about “The Rack” made me remember a time in the old “Buttmobile”…..I’m not really sure who all were in the machine at the time, but we were camped up on Temple Flat during a muzz hunt and decided it would be a good time to head over to the Randolph area for an evening look about.  The Magpie Express was all loaded and headed down the road before the occupants of the Buttmobile were loaded.  So we were a bit behind the Magpie and his group.  One thing you have to understand is our driving differences.  Magpie has a theory that can’t be denied about driving in the woods looking for animals….The faster you drive, the more open space you can see between the trees and for any of you reading this, I’m certain you can remember times driving down the road and watching the flicking of posts, trees or bushes going past.  They are as if they aren’t even there as you can see the cows or horses out in the fields on the other side of the bushes/trees etc. without any difficulty.

So, it is very understandable that Magpie drives pretty quickly down the mountain roads looking for his quarry.

On the other hand, I like to drive verrrrryyyyy sloooowwwllly.  My theory of spotting animals in the woods is one where the occupant of the moving vehicle is looking for horizontal objects in a vertical world.  I also look for that one eyeball that is looking back at me, or the twitching of an ear.  Some say on a dry and dusty day, one should look for the “puff of a fart” coming from the animal.  At any rate if you are going too fast, you will miss seeing it.

So, I must admit that over the years the Magpie Express has come back to camp with many more deer than the Buttmobile ever did.  That could be attributed to the caliber of occupants in the two rigs and their abilities to shoot and hit what they are aiming at.  AND/OR it could be that the occupants of the Buttmobile would like to be able to hit their animal at a closer range than some of the shots being taken from the Magpie Express.  No Lead….No dead.  It is clear that if you shoot enough times at something, no matter the distance, eventually you will hit it.

22MissedShots copy

So, here we are headed for Randolph at about 2 p.m.  We know we have about an hour of driving before we get there and then we will work our way back to camp by way of the back country roads and with any luck we will run across a few bucks and bring them into camp with us.  In any given deer camp at 2 in the afternoon, you know deep down in your heart that all the deer in the area are far from any road and laying down taking a nap.  Usually on a North facing slope and in the deepest and darkest part of the forest.  Every hunter knows this.

I’m driving behind Magpie and his rig and he has about a minute head start on me and so I’m hurrying to catch up.  I’m driving way too fast and gaining on his rig quickly.  When the front of my rig is about 20 feet from his, I release the pressure from the gas pedal and begin to coast.  Fat Duck is riding in the passenger seat along side me and it is obvious he knows I’m driving faster than my usual pace, but he says nothing.  Suddenly and without warning the Magpie Express comes to a complete stop!  Sliding and kicking up dust!!!!

In my mind I say…WHAT THE….!!!!!!!  And the Buttmobile also comes to a complete stop just a foot or so from the back end of the Express!

And then it happens……………backup lights come on!  OH NO!!!!

I reach for the five speed tranny shifter and pull it hard into neutral and then into reverse!  My eyes are wide and looking at the back of the Express as it is beginning to come backwards toward the Buttmobile!  I can’t get it into reverse!  My rifle is laying muzzle down along side me and it is keeping the shifter from coming back into reverse gear!  I bang hard against the rifle barrel (sights mostly), but no good, we are doomed!

BLAM!  The Express suddenly slams the front of the Buttmobile with a force equal to a small train!  The Buttmobile lurches backward with the momentum and all heads in the unit are arched first forward toward the front of the vehicle and then just as suddenly, backward toward the rear of the unit.  The dust begins to settle.

I turned to Fat Duck and asked….”Did your air bag deploy”????  (Most rigs made in the mid 80’s didn’t have air bags installed and of course I was just joking with him).

What caused Magpie to suddenly hit the skids and put his rig into reverse?  A deer.  Laying right along side the road.  The guys in my rig would never have seen it.

Well, a quick assessment of the minimal damage to the front of the Buttmobile and we were off to enjoy our afternoon and evening drive about.

Months after this incident I thought it would be appropriate to install a symbol of the Magpie Express on the Buttmobile as a momento, but when you think about it, installing a 1982 Suburban on the hood of a 1987 Isuzu Trooper would make it very hard to see what was ahead.  I put a lot of thought into just what I should do and came up with this:

COOOOOOLDMagpie12Below copyThe eyes on this replica was about proportionate to mine at the time of the “crash”!

Bears Butt

September 13, 2014


Leave A Comment, Written on September 13th, 2014 , Hunting Stories
By: Bears Butt

To all my friends “my age”, this one is for you! Remember “Born to be Wild”? This is the older person version, we would have never understood 40 years ago. Enjoy!

1 Comment, Written on September 11th, 2014 , Just more stories
By: Bears Butt


With the coming of the Muzz deer hunt comes a whole lot of reminiscing and none brings such great memories than “The Rack”.

So, what is “The Rack”?  Well, a whole lot of years ago, Weasel brought up his truck and with the truck came some road hunting.  And for anyone who has ever ridden in the back of a pickup up a winding, steep, rut filled mountain road you know exactly how tough it is to hold on to your rifle, your drink and keep your butt inside the truck, let alone try and see a deer or two out in the brush.  So, we modified the truck and put up a quakie “rack” on it.  Lashed the branches down as best as we could and called it “The Rack”.  We rode around all week in that rickity thing and every bump caused it to lean to one side or the other until by the end of the hunt the smarter of us decided it was safer to walk than ride.


Well, the idea stuck and by the time the next season came along I had found an old discarded set of metal poles in the “hole” and salvaged them.  It didn’t take long to construct a metal pole “rack” for the back of the truck.  Add to it some “hangers” for the guys to hang possibles bags and canteens and suddenly we had a pretty good little “rack” on the truck that was sturdy and relatively safe for the riders.  All were happy for awhile.  You can stand up in the back of the truck, lean against the rack without fear of falling out, see very well in all directions and it is just a pleasure to ride back there.  Except…………there are always exceptions.


Suddenly, the city boys and girls decided it wasn’t very warm riding in the rack.  Put more clothing on…we said.  But the rack is cold, the metal holds the cold longer than a cooler can hold ice….they said…wear gloves we said…but…but….but…and the list goes on and on.  We (Weasel and I) decided that “The Rack” was a good thing and the more comforts we have inside the cab of the truck, the more we should share with the occupants of the rack in the back.  Here there are some limits however.  We have no way to push hot air back to them and so they will have to continue to wear warm clothing, coats, hats, mittens and such.  But we could make them a bit more comfortable by adding some insulation to the pipes that make up the rack itself.  We asked our friend Gunner to provide the necessary insulation….but that didn’t happen….so I went out on the limb with my budget and purchased $3.42 worth of pipe insulation…..I know… budget is straining, but I can make the sacrifice for my friends…

Not only that, but we knew that our friends in the back also needed a way to secure their rifles so they could hold on in with both hands in cases of extreme cold or steepness of hill, without fear of their weapons falling over or dropping out of the back of the rack.  Again, I looked over my budget and decided the bank could make a small loan in this endeavor if needed.  Again a trip to the store to purchase necessary supplies to build such a contraption to hold 4 guns securely….another hit of $.43 for bolts.  So, my friends, you see, I have invested nearly $4 to provide you with comforts never before had in the rack.  I am a nice guy.

But you haven’t seen those comforts yet.  Here is a sneak peek:

TheRackYou can see it appears nobody is holding the rifle on the right side.  You can also see the pipe insulation on the rails.  But what does it look like with people on board?  How’s this:

ModifiedRackOH YA!  That is comfort in it’s biggest sense, however you will not be allowed to sit on a chair like Weasel is.  You will have to stand, or at best, sit on a cooler.  And be assured your rifle will be protected from everything except the weather…that is still a problem for you, you might want to invest in a plastic bag or something.  We can’t do it all for you, at least not all at once.

TheRackGunRackNotice also, that not only will your rifle barrel fit snugly in the holder, but in case of very bumpy roads or if you are just plain paranoid about your rifle falling out, you can “buckle up”!  We try to think of everything for our guests comfort.


I can hardly wait!

Bears Butt

September 10, 2014



5 Comments, Written on September 10th, 2014 , Hunting Stories
By: Bears Butt


15 days till we head for the hills!

So, what has gone on in the last 5 days?  HMMMMMM……well we had a meeting about the hunt and drank some adult beverages.  I finished the batch of sweetbreads that I plan on taking to the hunt for all to enjoy.  And Weasel and I are working on some modifications to “The Rack”.  My list of things to take is growing almost hourly and this year will be a very different one for me, as my hunting trailer is staying home and I have been invited to sleep in “The Dog House”.

When a change like that comes along it really makes you think about what you need to be bringing on the hunt.  You see, all my things are loaded in that camping trailer and I have been adding things for this hunt ever since we got back from Conner’s bow hunt.  If I forget something for this hunt I will be kicking myself in the rear end the whole time.  But then, someone said once (or twice):  Gun, powder, ball, cap, license…..everything else is a luxury.

Well for old people that list has to be expanded some.  Add to it, insulated underwear, pants, shirt, coat, toilet paper, glasses, hat, radio, phone, cash, beer, food, binoculars, game bag, liver bucket, rope, knife, camera, beaver sharn, kill jug, boobin baby board, measuring tape, marking pen, “Luci” lanterns, gambrel, chain saw, gas, oil, tool box, capot, Kipper snacks, crackers, jerky, hydration pack, extra change of clothes, special surprise gifts, atv, extra gas, tie down straps, shooting cross sticks (what have I forgotten?)…..and then everything else is a luxury.

Whatever happened to the day you just put the rifle over your shoulder and headed out to hunt?  Was there ever such a day?  Maybe back before guns, when the man of the cave just walked out the opening of the cave with nothing but his bare hands to go and get some food.  Suddenly someone invented a spear!  And “Luxury” began.

Look how far we have come, from walking out the cave opening with only our bare hands at a cost of nothing, to absolutely needing all the things I have mentioned including about $1,000 for fuel, because I’ll be danged if I’m walking far.  And with anticipation of bagging a 65 pound deer.  Times have changed alot since Nanook….his anticipation included huge beasts in excess of a ton.  Maybe I should set my sights a bit higher.


Bears Butt

September 8, 2014


Leave A Comment, Written on September 8th, 2014 , Hunting Stories
By: Bears Butt


I was at the movies and bought a popcorn that cost $3.50
I remarked that the last time I bought popcorn it was a dime.
The attendant smartly replied, “Boy you are really going to enjoy this,because now we have sound”.

Leave A Comment, Written on September 5th, 2014 , Jokes I like!
By: Bears Butt


Back in the early 1950’s, the United States got involved with a crisis between North and South Korea.  We sent thousands of soldiers there to protect the South Koreans from their nemesis the North Koreans.  During that conflict, hundreds of our men were wounded or worse and one of them wounded was 4 Hooves (Roy Torgeson).  Roy spent weeks in the hospital recovering from his wounds and then was sent home, a hero in every respect.  Usually, when a soldier gets wounded in battle, the records are clear and orders are cut recognizing the fact and a Purple Heart is awarded.  Along with the Purple Heart award comes a token amount of monthly compensation.

In Roy’s case, there was no such award nor compensation.

Roy spent years and years sending letters and trying his best to make the Commanders realize this error, but to no avail.  And then the warehouse that held all the military records in Kansas City burnt to the ground, taking with it all the records that were stored there….Roy’s was among the ashes.  He continued to send letters and make phone calls but nobody would listen.

When our friend Dan “Muskrat” Gyllenskog heard about Roy’s wounds, he began to ask questions and get more people involved through the Veterans of Foreign Wars ranks.  Years went by with Muskrat pursuing the award.  It looked like it would never come to be as he continued to hit road block after road block.  Even the Utah State Commander of the VFW got involved and he too hit road blocks everywhere he turned.

Finally, after years of “this battle”, someone in a high position in the Army, listened.  He reviewed the letters and the documentation submitted by doctors and others, clearly seeing the scars of the wounds in X-rays and reading the doctors statements about these scars .  That they could only have come from bullets or fragments of bullets.  And the age of the scars were from that time frame.

Nearly one year ago, Roy received a letter of recognition and his first compensatory check from the US Army command and has since received a check from them every month.  But still no Purple Heart.  Yesterday, September 4, 2014, Roy got a call from the Ogden Standard Examiner’s military correspondent who wanted to come and talk to him.  Of course Roy allowed the visit and this man (Mitch Shaw) talked to him about writing his story in the paper and coming to his presentation.  Yesterday Roy also recieved a letter from the US Army headquarters stating that they recognized their error and that he will be presented with his long over due Purple Heart.  The presentation will be conducted by Senator Rob Bishop at 10 a.m., on October 18th, at the George E. Wahlen building 1102 N. 1200 W., Ogden Utah.

Roy called me this morning with the good news!  Congratulations Roy!  Persistence paid off, finally!  I for one will be at the presentation and I hope everyone reading this will be as well.

I am so happy to be writing this and my thoughts turn immediately to our buddy Muskrat.  He wanted Roy to receive this award so badly.  He and I talked many hours about it and the stumbling blocks he kept encountering in his pursuit.  How can something so plain be such a problem for the one in command not to see?  Finally with all the evidence they woke up and signed the declaration and cut the final orders for Roy to receive this award.

Congratulations again Roy!  And a hearty THANK YOU to Muskrat and everyone else that helped in this cause!

Bears Butt

September 5, 2014

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Just some of my old stories, new stories, and in general what is going on in my life.