By: Bears Butt

 

I found a really good recipe for fortune cookies on line at “About.com:Chinese Food” .  It is an easy recipe to follow and makes really good tasting fortune cookies.

Why would a mountain man want to make fortune cookies?  I’m glad you asked.  Because I (and my group of hunting buddies) like to cut up and this is a good way to put in fortunes that are pertinent to the hunt we are on.  Especially special hunts like we have coming up this week.  Dry Dogs Dream Hunt.

So, when you know the characters that are going to be at the hunt, you can tailor the fortunes to those folks and hope they draw out the cookie that most applies to them.  But if they don’t that is ok too.  The main thing is to have fun and doing different things on each hunt makes that hunt stand out from all the others.

So, let’s say you too are going on a dream deer hunt and a bunch of buddies are going along for the ride and to help you out.  You are going to want to have at least one fortune cookie for each one of them and inside the cookie will be some special note.  You have to make up the notes ahead of doing the cookie recipe, cuz the note has to be put inside the cookie.  So let’s make us some notes.

One of mine says:  Quote of the year 2010, “Now that’s what I’m talkin about right there!”—Hunter

He made that quote as he was looking at an extremely large mule deer buck that was being shown to us at our camp from a very happy hunter.

One of my favorite sayings and I say it a lot during the hunts,

Don’t shoot at the antlers.

 

So, you make up yours accordingly.

Ok, so here is the recipe and how I have changed it up some.  On line, this recipe says it will do about 10 cookies, I’m here to tell you it will make a whole lot more than that if you follow my lead on this.

Recipe:  2 Large egg whites, ½ teaspoon vanilla extract (they say “pure” vanilla extract…what’s that?), ½ teaspoon almond extract (I’m going to try some of this stuff when I trap muskrats next spring, it smells like it would attract them), 3 tablespoons vegetable oil (I used olive oil), 8 tablespoons all purpose flour, 1 ½ teaspoons cornstarch, 1/4 teaspoon salt, 8 tablespoons granulated sugar and lastly 3 teaspoons water.

Grab up two bowls to mix in.

In one put the egg whites, vanilla, almond and oil…using a fork, beat the pee-jeasus out of it until it froths but doesn’t go beyond that point, you are not making meringue.

Now in the other bowl sift together the dry ingredients: flour, cornstarch, salt and sugar, when you are satisfied they are all mixed pretty consistently, add the water and stir that around some.  Now, dump all of this into the egg bowl of stuff.  Mix this up until it is smooth as silk and no lumps are seen.

OK, so the recipe I found on line says to use a cookie sheet and put a full tablespoon of the mix in spaces apart from each other and twirl the pan around until the piles of mix spread out and are about 4 inches across blah, blah, blah.  I guess if you were in a hurry or had some help you could do this, but take it from me, if you are working alone you won’t have time to deal with more than two at a time.  Here is what I do.

I got two pie pans out, with smooth bottoms, not the bumpy bottom ones.  Then I dip out some mix with a tablespoon and I spread around a thin layer of the mix until it’s about 4 inches across.  It’s really thin and you will see why in a minute.  Once you have that spread out in the pan, put it in the preheated oven of 300 degrees.  I forgot to tell you that earlier.  300 degrees.

This next part was hard for me to understand at first, but it makes sense now.  These babies are going to take upwards of 15 minutes to brown up.  In my neck of the woods, at 4200 ft. above sea level it takes 11 minutes.

I hope you have your messages all folded up and ready to be put into the cookies, cuz if you don’t you just have 11 minutes to get two of them ready.  Fold them up pretty small.  Now, get out a small spatchula and an empty cup with thin walls.  Get a hotpad out too.  When the timer goes off and you can see the cookie has brown around the edge maybe even ½ in into the cookie they are done.

Work really fast now!  Spatchula up that cookie and flip it over onto the hotpad.  Grab up a fortune note and place it off center on the cookie.  Fold the cookie over the note and then pick the hot little devil up and push the folded edge down over the edge of the cup.  Hot ain’t it ?  Set it down, but keep track of the edges so they don’t come apart.  The burning pain will be gone soon as it cools!  I hope your buddies are worth all of this pain and trouble.

A trick to be noted here, if you have a muffin pan handy, instead of bearing the burning pain, you can put the folded cookie inside one of the pan spaces and it will hold its shape and you won’t get burned so much.

Can you see why putting a bunch of the mix on a cookie sheet just would not allow you enough time to process all of those hot little guys fast enough before they cooled to the point you could not bend them?

Well you should have yourself two fortune cookies made by now.  Sort of fun huh?  And the very best part is you made them and they have personal fortunes in them.

By doing it my way and making thinner cookies you will get about 26 cookies out of this mix.

Some other stuff you might want to know.  You can color the mix by adding food coloring at the stage where you mixed it to smooth as silk.  Green, red, blue, yellow, black…whatever!  How about making black ones for someones wedding?  Blue ones for the boy baby shower or pink for the girl baby shower?

Bears Butt

Nov. 2011

Written on November 21st, 2011 , Recipes
By: Bears Butt

The “Beginning” of why the Willow Creek Free Trappers changed my mountain man name from “Manysteps” to “Weasel”…

by Brandon Zundel on Friday, September 9, 2011 at 3:13pm

Back in about ’03 the Willow Creekers were pretty dang serious about finding, and purchasing a bit of land to hold the annual rendezvous.

 

Many pieces were looked at, but they always had issues… too much dust, not any trees, “this one’s great, but there’s no stream”, no hill to shoot into, not big enough, not flat enough, too far away, and the list goes on and on.

 

At some point I’m talking to Bears Butt and he mentions that Wapiti Dung placed an ad on KSL.com’s classifieds “looking for land”… I said, “you know what would be funny?”… and he could see the twinkle of a good prank in my eye… he says, “do it.”

 

So that evening I jumped on Yahoo, and created an email for that purpose… (markscreamr@yahoo.com) Then sent him (roughly) the following email:

 

“Hi, I saw your ad on KSL, and I recently inherited some land that I’d be interested in selling. Give me a call and I can tell you what I know about it.

 

(phone number went here)

 

Sincerely,

 

Mark”

 

I was at work the next day when my cell phone rang.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Hi, is this Mark?”

 

“Yes, this is Mark”

 

“Hi Mark, this is John Zundel. You emailed me yesterday about some land you might have available. Can you tell me a bit about it?”

 

“Well, I’ll tell you what I can. You see, I’m not from this area, and I just recently acquired the land from my uncle’s estate.”

 

(Wapiti’s ears perk up)

 

“You access the land by going up Logan canyon. Do you know where that is?”

 

“Yes, I know where that is”, Wapiti says with a slight tremor in his voice.

 

“Now, I don’t know if I can completely explain how to get there, but I’d say it’s some 3/4 of the way to the top of the canyon. I’ve only been there 2 or 3 times, and I doubt I can find it in the dark.

 

Anyway, you access the property with a road on the North side of the main highway. You drive in about a mile before you reach the gate to the property.

 

Once you go through the gate, you’ll go about another half mile where trees line both sides of the road.

 

At that point the area opens up to an open flat area where the creek kinda meanders through the middle. The creek does a bit of a “U” pattern around an area that would probably fit 50 or so camp trailers.

 

On the NorthWest side of the flat it turns to a really steep hill and the property line is about 300 yards up that hill… about the only thing I can think that part of the property would be good for is to shoot target practice into.

 

All in all, we have about 30 acres. Does this sound about what you’re looking for, John?”

 

“Um… well, I mean… uh… how’s the road in? Is it something you could get trailers into, or is it steep, rocky, and bumpy? What about tree branches hitting trailers, and how do you get across the creek?”

 

“Oh, well we just had the road graded… you’d probably need to do that every 5 to 10 years depending on the traffic. We just trimmed the trees back, but that’s probably an annual thing. And the bridge across the creek is made of railroad ties, and it’s probably 12 feet wide.”

 

“Okay, well do you mind if I ask how much you want for it?”

 

“Well, that’s the part I’ve kinda been struggling with… I don’t know what land goes for around here, and considering there’s no power or running water… I was thinking $50,000… am I off base with that?”

 

(You can hear him practically breathing into a paper sack to calm himself down)

 

After quite a long pause, he says (with a stutter), “When could we come take a look at it?”

 

By the sheer excitement in his voice, I know it’s time to let the cat out of the bag before he has a heart attack.

 

I’m going to digress a bit in case you aren’t familiar with all the phraseology that will follow.

 

First, Wapiti is famous for saying “YOU’RE OUT OF THE WILL” whenever you do something he doesn’t “like”.

 

Second, every Sunday evening at rendezvous, he does a skit that’s a play on a Revivalist preacher named, “Reverend Billy Saltine” form “Barney and Cecil Georgia, The Golden Buckle of the Bible Belt of the South” (Say Amen)

 

And last, as far as I know, only family every refers to him as Jack.

 

— back to the story

 

“Well, I’m not quite sure John, I need to make a trip back east to finalize the details on my donations. See, I’m giving the proceeds of this land sale to a charity for de-willed children and nephews. (I pause… nope, hasn’t caught on yet)

 

In fact, you might have heard of the preacher who heads up the charity… have you heard of Reverend Billy?”

 

“Reverend Billy Graham?” (with a serious shake to his voice… excitement abounds!)

 

“No, Reverend Billy Saltine.”

 

“Can’t say I have” (Are you kidding me?!)

 

“Yeah, he’s from Barney and Cecil Georgia… it is the golden buckle of the bible belt of the south after all”

 

(I pause to let it sink in… but all I have is silence)

 

“John, can you hold?”

 

“Oh sure.” (Voice still shaking)

 

I mute the phone, and fall on the floor laughing uncontrollably…

 

When I finally get it back together, I un-mute the phone.

 

“You still there, Jack?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Wapiti Dung, You’ve been had!”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“Jack! Snap out of it! This is Brandon! This whole thing has been a joke!”

 

“YOU SON OF A BITCH!”

 

(He hung up on me)

Written on November 20th, 2011 , Just more stories
By: Bears Butt

The very large muley buck is standing on the hill below you.  The very cold morning moutain air is frozen and small crystaline flakes are falling like snow.  There are no clouds in the sky.  It’s like a magic show with pixie dust as the main player.  Your nostrils freeze as you take a deep nasel breath and prepare to calm yourself before the shot.

Your week long stubbly beard is covered with ice from your frozen breath.  You are locked in on the big buck and how your shot must be made.  This is no time for failure.  Everything must work perfectly.  The buck does not know you are there.  It is calmly feeding on a sage branch tip.

You analyze the antlers.  Counting every tine…one, two, three, four, five, six and long eyeguards.  How wide is it?  You cannot tell from this angle, but the mass of the antlers at the base indicates a very heavy set and so width is not in the equation.  You have made up your mind.  This is the buck of my dreams.  My dreams and no body elses.

Slowly you slide to your left and find a clear lane through the cedar trees through which you can shoot.  Your eyes are glued to the bucks vitals as you must concentrate on the point of impact and not on the trophy size rack on the bucks head.  Concentrate.  Concentrate.  You take your eyes off the buck long enough to find a good stable rest for your rifle.  A rest that will steady the sights from your ever increasing pounding heart.

Back on the target your eyes settle as you slowly and deliberately draw the hammer of your cap lock rifle back to full cock.  Click!  Click!  Goes the sound of the hammer cocking.  To you it was very loud in the still morning air.  The buck raises it’s head and looks in your direction!  You think to yourself, “Have I been busted?  Does the buck see me behind this dead cedar?”  You don’t move a muscle.  The longest minute goes by as the buck is searching the hill for whatever made that sound.  A sound it has never heard before.

Your heart is pounding so fiercely now even with the rest of the dead tree to steady the sights they are still moving off target.  You find yourself breathing harder and harder.  Again, you tell yourself to calm down.  The buck drops it’s head back to its feeding and takes a small step forward.  You can not see the bucks head, only the full shoulder and back to its rump.  You breath another deep nostril breath and this time you do not notice the freezing inside your nose.  It’s now or never for your shot.

You pick up the front sight and slowly settle it into the rear slot, like you have done so many, many times before at the range.  This time your target is a large mottled brown and gray side of the largest mule deer buck you have ever been this close to in your life.  The sight picture is placed perfectly, slightly low from center to account for the rise of the bullet as it travels down hill toward the animal.

You are locked into this moment.  Nothing else is on your mind.  Your dream is about to become reality.

____________________________-

So, how does this story end?  Will the cap go off?  Did he even put a cap on?  Will the powder charge go off?  Afterall, the powder was loaded the day before this hunt began and he has been carrying his rifle through rain, snow, dry times, the heat of the vehicle and the cold of the vehicle at night.  HMMM.  Can you finish this story?

Just click on “leave a comment” below and tells us how this story ends.  Thanks!

Bears Butt

Nov. 2011

Written on November 20th, 2011 , DREAM HUNTS
By: Bears Butt

Today: A 20 percent chance of snow. Mostly cloudy, with a high near 33. East wind around 5 mph becoming west southwest.

Tonight: A 20 percent chance of snow. Mostly cloudy, with a low around 15. Southwest wind 5 to 7 mph becoming southeast.

Monday: A 20 percent chance of snow. Partly sunny, with a high near 37. South wind at 7 mph becoming west.

Monday Night: Partly cloudy, with a low around 15. West wind between 5 and 7 mph.

Tuesday: Mostly sunny, with a high near 38. Southwest wind between 3 and 6 mph.

Tuesday Night: Mostly clear, with a low around 20.

Wednesday: Mostly sunny, with a high near 44.

Wednesday Night: Partly cloudy, with a low around 21.

Thanksgiving Day: A chance of rain and snow. Snow level 6800 feet lowering to 6300 feet in the afternoon . Mostly cloudy, with a high near 42.

Thursday Night: Snow likely. Cloudy, with a low around 19.

Friday: A chance of snow. Cloudy, with a high near 29.

Friday Night: A slight chance of snow. Mostly cloudy, with a low around 15.

Saturday: Mostly cloudy, with a high near 33.

Written on November 20th, 2011 , DREAM HUNTS
By: Bears Butt

Well, I have not posted in a day or two.  What’s with that?  Busy is all I can say.  I have a ton of stuff to get done before Dry Dogs hunt and I have just now started to do any of it.  Jerky!

Still have to grind up some more meat and then install an in/out thermometer for Tracker in his rig.  That should not take too long.  Then it’s check the propane, get them filled if needed.  Charge two batterys for the trailer….you know the drill.

And of course the usual things to get done around the house and yard.  Maybe I extended my duck hunting out too far……….NOT!

At any rate, my head is now in the Dream Hunt mode and it won’t be out of that mode until the hunt is over!  What say ye, Mr. Dry Dog?

Bears Butt

Nov. 2011

Written on November 19th, 2011 , Uncategorized
By: Bears Butt

Winter Weather Advisory

Tonight: A 30 percent chance of snow. Mostly cloudy, with a low around 21. West southwest wind between 16 and 21 mph. Total nighttime snow accumulation of less than a half inch possible.

Friday: Snow, mainly after 11am. High near 37. West southwest wind between 10 and 17 mph. Chance of precipitation is 90%. New snow accumulation of around an inch possible.

Friday Night: Snow. Low around 15. Northwest wind around 9 mph. Chance of precipitation is 80%. New snow accumulation of 1 to 3 inches possible.

Saturday: Snow likely, mainly before 11am. Mostly cloudy, with a high near 28. West northwest wind around 8 mph. Chance of precipitation is 60%. New snow accumulation of less than one inch possible.

Saturday Night: Mostly cloudy, with a low around 8. South southwest wind around 8 mph.

Sunday: Partly sunny, with a high near 34.

Sunday Night: Partly cloudy, with a low around 9.

Monday: Mostly sunny, with a high near 36.

Monday Night: Mostly clear, with a low around 12.

Tuesday: Mostly sunny, with a high near 42.

Tuesday Night: Mostly cloudy, with a low around 18.

Wednesday: Partly sunny, with a high near 47.

Wednesday Night: Mostly cloudy, with a low around 22.

Thanksgiving Day: A chance of snow showers. Cloudy, with a high near 47.

Thanks NOAA!

Bears Butt

Nov. 2011

Written on November 17th, 2011 , DREAM HUNTS
By: Bears Butt

This happened many, many years ago while on a muzzleload deer hunt here in Utah.  There were several of us in the camp, not nearly the size of camp we have today, but we did have two trailers in which the hunters were to sleep.

My trailer had myself, Edjukateer and Fat Duck assigned to sleep in it.  The trailer is not a very large one, 18 ft long.  It has a bathroom,  fridge,  stove and heater.  It can sleep six people but two of them would have to weigh less than 150 pounds each.  We try to make everyone as comfortable as we can and so three would be sleeping in my trailer this year.

I need to mention that my trailer also has a holding tank for fresh water and a hot water heater.  When it’s all hooked up it is a home away from home.  It even has a shower if you want to take one.

This hunt was typical of most muzz hunts, in that we tend to drink a few beers during the day and those who partake of harder liquids do that later in the evening.  Usually just before we retire for the night.  Of course slugging down a few brews during the day, tends to make one thirsty during the night.  So when a guy has the urge to go to the bathroom, he usually fills a glass with water and drinks it down before going back to bed.

While preparing for this hunt, I decided that we would not “undo” the winterization in my trailer and so that meant there would not be any hot water, nor shower capabilites, nor running water of any sort.  We would be pouring our water needs out of 5 gallon containers and that would have to suffice.  Everyone was in agreement and so that is the way we were living during this hunt.

A side note on how people were living in these days.  At the time I wore glasses in order to see distance.  Not an uncommon thing to wear.  And at the time, there was a great push for people to get a little vain and be fitted with contact lenses.  Edjukateer had undertook the “non glasses” look and had himself some contact lenses.  Now, he looked a lot cooler without glasses than if he was wearing them, and so,  he was looking real cool on this hunt.  The rest of us glasses wearers weren’t as cool looking.

There are drawbacks to wearing glasses and there are drawbacks to wearing contact lenses.  Glasses drawbacks….you just don’t look cool.  And you have to clean them once in awhile and try not to scratch the lenses.  Contact drawbacks…if you look too cool, nobody will hang out with you.  You have to put drops in your eyes when you put them in or they will hang up on your eyeball and hurt.  If dirt gets between the eye and the lens it hurts like heck causing tearing, pain and misery.  You have to take them out before you can go to sleep.

Back to the hunt.

As the night progressed after day 2, Fat Duck had consumed his share of bubbly brews, as did the rest of us.  He had a powerful dry, to say the least when he got up for his middle of the night relief of his bladder.  He had determined it was way too cold to go outside to do his duty and so, he chose to use the bathroom.  Which was perfectly ok to do, that is what it is for.  Once done, he crawled back into his warm sleeping bag and went back to sleep.

It wasn’t long before the alarm clock went off, announcing the beginning of day 3 of the hunt.  I bailed off the top bunk and lit the stove to get the coffee going.  Grabbed myself a glass of V8 juice and sat on the bed at the foot of Edjukateers feet.  Slowly Edjukateer and Fat Duck began to stir and smell the coffee and they knew it was time to get their butts out of bed.

Edjukateer got up and worked his way into the bathroom and proceeded to wake himself up.  Soon, he poked his head out of the door way and asked if anyone had moved his contacts.  None of us had.  He looked everywhere.  But no contacts were to be seen.  I asked him where he had put them and he said in a dixie cup in the bathroom, right behind the sink on and off handles.

Duck asked, “Did the cup have some water in it?”  Yes it did was the reply!  “Oh Crap!  I got lazy and instead of pouring myself a cup of water in another cup, I saw there was nearly a full cup of water already in the cup on the counter and I drank it!”

And so, it is a good thing that Fat Duck already had a good mountain man name because he could have gotten one that might not have been sayable in public.

Edjukateer had a backup pair of contacts and so the hunt was still on for him, but the Fat Duck was looking forward and backward at the same time for several days.

Bears Butt

Nov. 2011

Written on November 17th, 2011 , Hunting/Fishing/Trapping Stories
By: Bears Butt

Boy it’s great to be retired.  Going duck hunting with an old friend we call “Gattlin”.  He likes his duck hunting and today he should get his limit in short order.  The next storm isn’t coming in until Friday, but there should be a lot of ducks milling around today.

More to come later!

Bears Butt

Nov. 2011

As expected Gattlin arrived early, all excited to get out into the swamp and kill something.  I was too, but I did not expect him to be THAT early.  Anyway, we ate a bit of breakfast that he brought and had a cup of coffee, and then we went.

A beautiful day!  But not necessarily one you would go out of your way to go duck hunting on.  Pretty much a cloudless sky.  Warm, temps hovering in the mid 40’s.  Very little wind.

We got the box bailed and the decoys set, and settled in for an afternoon of, well sitting.

Except the ducks would have nothing to do with that!  Frank had not been duck hunting in two years and was a bit rusty.  He had his limit by noon!  NOON I say!

I had none by the time he dropped his last one.  So, here I limp along shooting and shooting and shooting.  The ducks were very cooperative, coming in, flaring perfectly and flying off unscathed!  What in the heck is going on?  I feel like an Edjukateer here!!!!  I fire, they flare!  I shoot, they duck!  I bang, they swang!  I pop, they poop!  I could not get anything to touch them birds.  Frank offers me his shotgun, but the stock is too long.  I can’t get it to my shoulder and be able to get my cheek down on the stock.  I’m back to my 20.

Another duck is swinging right into the decoys!  I jump, I aim, I shoot, it FOLDS!  YAHOOOOOOOOO!  Finally I have bagged a duck.  I look at Frank, “Did you shoot?”….he did not.  YIIPPEEEE!  I finally have a dead duck!

Frank offers the other side of the blind!  OK, I’ll take the seat.  Here comes two.  There coming.  There coming.  There they are…”Take em Zoonie!”  I’m up, I’m on one of them, I shoot……dang!  (chuckling in the background)

What in the He** is going on.  The other day I could not miss, today, I can’t hit my A** with a scoop shovel.

Finally, at 3:30 our limits are filled!  Thank you Lord!  The embarrassment went on for far to long a time.  I feel humbled.  At least for now.  But Edjukateer, don’t you think for a minute I won’t give you more grief in the future about your own shooting abilities.

I guess there is one consolation.   Back at the truck we counted how many shells we shot……Gattlin…AT LEAST 40!!!!  Me…..18!  I guess that’s the difference between a bolt action 20 and an auto loading 12!  Thanks for the fun time Frank!  There should be another before the lake freezes up!  Let’s hope so anyway!

Bears Butt

Nov. 16, 2011

 

Written on November 16th, 2011 , Hunting/Fishing/Trapping Stories
By: Bears Butt

Pour on the duck fat, in moderation

Nutrition Lab

Foodies say it’s high in beneficial unsaturated fats and closer in composition to olive oil than butter. Though that’s true, experts say the health claims are overstated.

March 27, 2011|By Elena Conis, Special to the Los Angeles Times

Love fries but hate the thought of artery-clogging fried food?

A growing number of gourmet restaurants and foodies see a solution to this conundrum in an unlikely source — duck fat. They consider it a healthy alternative to frying foods in pork fat, beef fat or even butter. Duck fat is high in beneficial unsaturated fats, and its chemical composition is closer to olive oil than to butter, they say.

Plus, it’s delicious. “I love it,” said David Bazirgan, executive chef at the Fifth Floor restaurant in San Francisco. “It has a deep, rich flavor that coats the palate.”

But some experts say health claims about the fat are overstated. Though duck fat is among the healthiest of animal fats, it’s still a significant source of saturated fats, said Dr. Freny Mody, director of cardiology for the Greater Los Angeles Veterans Affairs Healthcare System.

“It may be a peg closer to olive oil, but it’s still miles away,” Mody said.

Duck fat’s popularity has surged in part because consumers are seeking all-natural, locally sourced alternatives to commercially produced items, said Melissa Abbott, culinary insights director with the Hartman Group, a Seattle-area market research firm. Compared with, say, margarine, duck fat has a single, minimally processed ingredient: fat taken from ducks. It’s available from local butchers and at farmers markets, though a few national retailers sell it as well.

Abbott said the fat had also gained some cachet thanks to the so-called French paradox — the observation that the French are thinner and have a lower incidence of cardiovascular disease than Americans despite enjoying a diet loaded in fat. The paradox has stumped researchers for decades, though some theories chalk it up to a number of characteristics of the French diet — including small portions, lots of red wine, and, of course, the consumption of duck fat.

While traditional French recipes can call for copious amounts of the fat (duck confit, for instance, involves cooking duck legs immersed in duck fat for 10 hours), the current vogue in the U.S. is to use it in more sparing amounts to make fries, to roast potatoes or to saute vegetables. Chefs treasure its dense, savory flavor and its resistance to breaking down at high temperatures. They also like that it’s a healthful fat, Abbott said.

That belief is based on its composition of saturated and unsaturated fats. According to the National Nutrient Database maintained by the U.S. Department of Agriculture, duck fat contains 62% unsaturated fat and 33% saturated fat.

Saturated fats raise blood cholesterol and increase the risk of heart disease, said Dr. Karol Watson, co-director of the UCLA Cholesterol and Lipid Management Center. At 33%, duck fat’s saturated fat content isn’t terribly low, she points out. In fact, it’s on par with chicken fat (about 30% saturated fat) and pork fat (39% saturated fat). All three are better than butter, which is about 51% saturated fat.

Proponents of duck fat prefer to highlight its unsaturated fat content. Studies have linked unsaturated fats — including both monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats — to lower blood cholesterol levels. Dutch researchers who reviewed 60 studies of the effects of dietary fat intake found that replacing saturated fats with unsaturated fats reduced levels of bad cholesterol and raised levels of good cholesterol, which in turn decreased the incidence of coronary artery disease by 18% to 44%. Their findings were published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition in 2003.

Written on November 15th, 2011 , Recipes
By: Bears Butt

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, ‘If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?’

‘No, I had to stop drinking years ago’, the homeless woman told me.

‘Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?’ I asked.

‘No, I don’t waste time shopping,’ the homeless woman said. ‘I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.’

‘Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?’ I asked.

‘Are you NUTS! ‘replied the homeless woman. I haven’t had my hair done in 20 years! ‘

‘Well, I said, ‘ I’m not going to give you the money. Instead, I’m going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight. ‘

The homeless Woman was shocked. ‘Won’t your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I’m dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.’

I said, ‘That’s okay. It’s important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.’

Written on November 14th, 2011 , Jokes I like!

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Just some of my old stories, new stories, and in general what is going on in my life.